the-truth
Original: the-truth on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Child: Daddy! Can I ask you something?
Father (thinking): Oh god. Here it comes. He's gonna ask if Santa is real.
Panel 2:
Father (thinking): Dammit dammit dammit! No! I won't tell him! He should enjoy the wonder and mystery of childhood!
Father (thinking): But then he'll think of a liar when he finds out the truth. He'll always trust you a little less.
Panel 3:
Father (thinking): You've got to do it! He's sophisticated all kids are wiser than you think! Tell their truth! Pay the energy of brutity! Just lay it out! Be a good dad! Just lay it out!
Panel 4:
Father (strained): What is it, son?
Father (strained, sweating): Am I gonna die one day or what?
Father: Never.
Votey:
Father: Everyone else. But not you.
Child: Daddy! Can I ask you something?
Father (thinking): Oh god. Here it comes. He's gonna ask if Santa is real.
Panel 2:
Father (thinking): Dammit dammit dammit! No! I won't tell him! He should enjoy the wonder and mystery of childhood!
Father (thinking): But then he'll think of a liar when he finds out the truth. He'll always trust you a little less.
Panel 3:
Father (thinking): You've got to do it! He's sophisticated all kids are wiser than you think! Tell their truth! Pay the energy of brutity! Just lay it out! Be a good dad! Just lay it out!
Panel 4:
Father (strained): What is it, son?
Father (strained, sweating): Am I gonna die one day or what?
Father: Never.
Votey:
Father: Everyone else. But not you.
Alt text
A four-panel comic. A small child approaches his father and says "Daddy! Can I ask you something?" The father immediately panics internally, certain the kid is about to ask whether Santa is real. Across the panels his thought bubbles spiral: he debates protecting the wonder of childhood versus being honest, agonizing that lying will make his son trust him less, and frantically psyching himself up to just tell the brutal truth and "be a good dad." His face grows increasingly strained and sweaty. Finally, gritting his teeth, he asks "What is it, son?" The child's actual question is: "Am I gonna die one day or what?" The father, after all that buildup about honesty, simply answers "Never." Votey (aftercomic): a close-up of the father's face, eyes shut, as he adds in a speech bubble: "Everyone else. But not you."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.