hey-there
Original: hey-there on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Woman (with reddish hair, approaching a man): Hey there, sexy. Lookin' for a self-respectin' time?
Man: Hm?
Panel 2:
Woman: I'm a reverse prostitute. My default behavior is to attempt to have sex with you. You pay for the opportunity to turn me down.
Panel 3:
Woman: It's 100% legal, and for a fraction of the cost of a psychiatrist, you will experience a powerful sense of self-possession, honor, and magnanimity.
Panel 4:
Man: Wow. You are being INCREDIBLY presumptuous about my interests and psychology.
Panel 5:
Woman: Hey! That feeling of righteous outrage ain't free.
Panel 6:
Man: Do you take credit card?
Votey:
A man with a wide, nervous open-mouthed expression. Hand-lettered text beside his face: I NEED YOU
Woman (with reddish hair, approaching a man): Hey there, sexy. Lookin' for a self-respectin' time?
Man: Hm?
Panel 2:
Woman: I'm a reverse prostitute. My default behavior is to attempt to have sex with you. You pay for the opportunity to turn me down.
Panel 3:
Woman: It's 100% legal, and for a fraction of the cost of a psychiatrist, you will experience a powerful sense of self-possession, honor, and magnanimity.
Panel 4:
Man: Wow. You are being INCREDIBLY presumptuous about my interests and psychology.
Panel 5:
Woman: Hey! That feeling of righteous outrage ain't free.
Panel 6:
Man: Do you take credit card?
Votey:
A man with a wide, nervous open-mouthed expression. Hand-lettered text beside his face: I NEED YOU
Alt text
A six-panel SMBC comic. A red-haired woman propositions a man on the street, asking if he's looking for a 'self-respectin' time.' She explains she is a 'reverse prostitute' whose default behavior is to attempt to have sex with him; he pays for the opportunity to turn her down. She pitches it as 100% legal and cheaper than a psychiatrist, giving him a powerful sense of self-possession, honor, and magnanimity. The man protests that she's being INCREDIBLY presumptuous about his interests and psychology. She retorts that the feeling of righteous outrage 'ain't free.' In the final panel, won over, he asks: 'Do you take credit card?' Votey (aftercomic): a crude black-and-white drawing of a man with a wide, nervous open-mouthed grimace and hand-lettered text reading 'I NEED YOU.'
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.