hunting-and-gathering
Original: hunting-and-gathering on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1: A small group of cave-people stands in a wide prehistoric landscape of mountains and water.
A man with red hair and beard: "I'm sick of hunting and gathering."
Panel 2: Close on the red-haired, red-bearded man as he pitches an idea.
Red-bearded man: "What if instead we found a single high-protein grain, then planted it over and over on a large piece of land that we'd have to defend with violence."
Panel 3: One of his listeners (a man in a fur tunic) responds.
Listener: "We'd spend most of the year taking care of the crop and fighting off vermin?"
Panel 4: The red-bearded man, smiling, continues.
Red-bearded man: "Then, after a "harvest," we could live mostly on grain-based foods that are designed to be robust to weather and climate conditions."
Panel 5: Three skeptical, frowning cave-men stand together looking unimpressed.
Panel 6: SOON... Two figures stand silhouetted on a cliff edge at dusk, looking out over a valley.
First figure: "Do you really think we should have killed him, though?"
Second figure: "Imagine a world with people like him in charge?"
Votey: A loose hand-drawn sketch of the red-bearded man fallen/sprawled, one arm raised triumphantly.
Fallen man: "I live! And I will return with thousands of somewhat malnourished progeny!"
A man with red hair and beard: "I'm sick of hunting and gathering."
Panel 2: Close on the red-haired, red-bearded man as he pitches an idea.
Red-bearded man: "What if instead we found a single high-protein grain, then planted it over and over on a large piece of land that we'd have to defend with violence."
Panel 3: One of his listeners (a man in a fur tunic) responds.
Listener: "We'd spend most of the year taking care of the crop and fighting off vermin?"
Panel 4: The red-bearded man, smiling, continues.
Red-bearded man: "Then, after a "harvest," we could live mostly on grain-based foods that are designed to be robust to weather and climate conditions."
Panel 5: Three skeptical, frowning cave-men stand together looking unimpressed.
Panel 6: SOON... Two figures stand silhouetted on a cliff edge at dusk, looking out over a valley.
First figure: "Do you really think we should have killed him, though?"
Second figure: "Imagine a world with people like him in charge?"
Votey: A loose hand-drawn sketch of the red-bearded man fallen/sprawled, one arm raised triumphantly.
Fallen man: "I live! And I will return with thousands of somewhat malnourished progeny!"
Alt text
A six-panel SMBC comic set in prehistoric times. A red-haired, red-bearded cave-man, standing in a mountain landscape, declares he is sick of hunting and gathering and proposes farming: finding a single high-protein grain, planting it over and over on land they'd have to defend with violence, spending the year tending the crop and fighting off vermin, so they could then live mostly on grain-based foods robust to weather and climate. His three companions look deeply unimpressed. Final panel, labeled SOON, shows two figures silhouetted on a cliff at dusk; one asks if they should really have killed him, the other replies, "Imagine a world with people like him in charge?" implying they murdered the inventor of agriculture. Votey: a loose sketch of the fallen red-bearded man raising one arm and crowing, "I live! And I will return with thousands of somewhat malnourished progeny!" - a punchline about agriculture's grim long-term legacy.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.