listening
Original: listening on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Salesman (in suit): Can I put a device in your house that perpetually listens to everything you say and do, stores that information, profits from it, and doesn't give you access to it.
Panel 2:
Man (with red/orange hair): You'd have to pay me a lot.
Salesman (off-panel / leaning in): No. You'll pay us.
Panel 3:
Man: Uh... pass?
Panel 4:
Salesman: The device can figure out when you're low on cheez balls and drone-deliver them in 30 minutes.
Panel 5:
Man (now eager, grabbing): Give me the machine!
Votey:
A close-up of the man's face, calm/resigned, with a speech bubble: "If it says apple on it, I will pay a stupid amount for it."
Salesman (in suit): Can I put a device in your house that perpetually listens to everything you say and do, stores that information, profits from it, and doesn't give you access to it.
Panel 2:
Man (with red/orange hair): You'd have to pay me a lot.
Salesman (off-panel / leaning in): No. You'll pay us.
Panel 3:
Man: Uh... pass?
Panel 4:
Salesman: The device can figure out when you're low on cheez balls and drone-deliver them in 30 minutes.
Panel 5:
Man (now eager, grabbing): Give me the machine!
Votey:
A close-up of the man's face, calm/resigned, with a speech bubble: "If it says apple on it, I will pay a stupid amount for it."
Alt text
A five-panel SMBC comic satirizing smart home speakers. Panel 1: A salesman in a suit asks a red-haired man, "Can I put a device in your house that perpetually listens to everything you say and do, stores that information, profits from it, and doesn't give you access to it." Panel 2: The man replies, "You'd have to pay me a lot." The salesman answers, "No. You'll pay us." Panel 3: The man, unimpressed, says, "Uh... pass?" Panel 4: The salesman adds, "The device can figure out when you're low on cheez balls and drone-deliver them in 30 minutes." Panel 5: The man, suddenly excited, lunges forward and shouts, "Give me the machine!" Votey: A close-up of the same man's face looking calm, saying, "If it says apple on it, I will pay a stupid amount for it."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.