marine-biology
Original: marine-biology on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Little girl (Sally): When I grow up I wanna be a marine biologist!
Man: I happen to know a marine biologist! Let's go talk to her!
Panel 2:
Sally: So what do you do all day?
Marine biologist (a woman): Every day, I look at data about ocean health and then I scream for a while.
Panel 3:
(Exterior shot of a building.)
Panel 4:
Marine biologist: This is my screaming room or "lab," where we figure out specifically why we're screaming.
Panel 5:
Marine biologist: We put that information in an envelope addressed to Congress, then we put that envelope into the recycling bin.
Marine biologist: And then we scream for a while.
Panel 6:
Man: Why aren't you screaming now?
Marine biologist: I have a lab technician screaming for me next door while I talk to you.
Panel 7:
Sally: I thought it was a firetruck.
Marine biologist: HAHA! Nope. It's pure abyssal horror whistling its way out of a grown woman's larynx!
Panel 8:
Sally: Wowwww.
Panel 9:
Man: So... you know... if Sally wants to do marine biology when she grows up...
Marine biologist: I would try to find life on Enceladus.
Votey:
The marine biologist (just her head): Nice meeting you. Bye AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA (a long scream of A's continuing across the top).
Little girl (Sally): When I grow up I wanna be a marine biologist!
Man: I happen to know a marine biologist! Let's go talk to her!
Panel 2:
Sally: So what do you do all day?
Marine biologist (a woman): Every day, I look at data about ocean health and then I scream for a while.
Panel 3:
(Exterior shot of a building.)
Panel 4:
Marine biologist: This is my screaming room or "lab," where we figure out specifically why we're screaming.
Panel 5:
Marine biologist: We put that information in an envelope addressed to Congress, then we put that envelope into the recycling bin.
Marine biologist: And then we scream for a while.
Panel 6:
Man: Why aren't you screaming now?
Marine biologist: I have a lab technician screaming for me next door while I talk to you.
Panel 7:
Sally: I thought it was a firetruck.
Marine biologist: HAHA! Nope. It's pure abyssal horror whistling its way out of a grown woman's larynx!
Panel 8:
Sally: Wowwww.
Panel 9:
Man: So... you know... if Sally wants to do marine biology when she grows up...
Marine biologist: I would try to find life on Enceladus.
Votey:
The marine biologist (just her head): Nice meeting you. Bye AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA (a long scream of A's continuing across the top).
Alt text
A nine-panel SMBC comic. A young girl named Sally tells a man she wants to be a marine biologist when she grows up, so he takes her to meet one. The marine biologist, a woman, calmly explains her job: every day she looks at data about ocean health and then screams for a while. She shows them her "screaming room" or lab where they figure out specifically why they're screaming, then they put that information in an envelope addressed to Congress, put the envelope in the recycling bin, and scream some more. When the man asks why she isn't screaming right now, she says a lab technician is screaming for her next door while she talks to them. Sally thought the noise was a firetruck; the biologist cheerfully corrects her: "Nope. It's pure abyssal horror whistling its way out of a grown woman's larynx!" Sally responds "Wowwww." Finally the man hints that if Sally pursues marine biology, the biologist replies she would try to find life on Enceladus instead. Votey: a close-up of the smiling biologist's face saying "Nice meeting you. Bye" followed by a long, trailing scream of "AAAAAAAA..." stretching across the top of the panel.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.