one-wish-4
Original: one-wish-4 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1: A leprechaun, caught by a man (shown in silhouette), holds up his hands.
Leprechaun: Ye've caught me! What is yer one wish?
Panel 2: The man, smiling broadly.
Man: I wish to constantly experience a low-grade feeling of dread.
Panel 3: The man continues, gesturing.
Man: Like, as if any minute now I'll be exposed as a loser and a fraud, and everyone — ESPECIALLY people who matter to me most — will admit they never believed in me for a moment.
Panel 4: The leprechaun, looking uncertain.
Leprechaun: Your wish is granted. But... why would you want that?
Panel 5: The man calmly.
Man: Other people don't know WHY they feel anxious and unhappy in an affluent, technologically advanced society.
Panel 6: The man enthusiastically gives a thumbs up.
Man: But ME? I blame the leprechaun!
Panel 7: The man stands smiling. The leprechaun has retreated to the far corner.
Man: Modern happiness is knowing exactly why you're so miserable.
Leprechaun: Please don't ever come to Fairyland.
Votey:
A loosely sketched close-up of the man's face, smiling weakly with a strained expression.
Man: So... happy...
Leprechaun: Ye've caught me! What is yer one wish?
Panel 2: The man, smiling broadly.
Man: I wish to constantly experience a low-grade feeling of dread.
Panel 3: The man continues, gesturing.
Man: Like, as if any minute now I'll be exposed as a loser and a fraud, and everyone — ESPECIALLY people who matter to me most — will admit they never believed in me for a moment.
Panel 4: The leprechaun, looking uncertain.
Leprechaun: Your wish is granted. But... why would you want that?
Panel 5: The man calmly.
Man: Other people don't know WHY they feel anxious and unhappy in an affluent, technologically advanced society.
Panel 6: The man enthusiastically gives a thumbs up.
Man: But ME? I blame the leprechaun!
Panel 7: The man stands smiling. The leprechaun has retreated to the far corner.
Man: Modern happiness is knowing exactly why you're so miserable.
Leprechaun: Please don't ever come to Fairyland.
Votey:
A loosely sketched close-up of the man's face, smiling weakly with a strained expression.
Man: So... happy...
Alt text
A seven-panel SMBC comic. A man catches a leprechaun, who offers him one wish. Instead of riches, the man wishes 'to constantly experience a low-grade feeling of dread' — specifically, the constant fear of being exposed as a loser and a fraud whom no one, especially the people he cares about most, ever believed in. The leprechaun grants it but asks why he would want that. The man explains that other people don't know why they feel anxious and unhappy in an affluent, technologically advanced society, but he, giving a cheerful thumbs up, gets to 'blame the leprechaun!' He concludes that 'modern happiness is knowing exactly why you're so miserable,' while the leprechaun, now cowering in the corner, begs, 'Please don't ever come to Fairyland.' The votey aftercomic shows a rough sketch close-up of the man's face wearing a weak, strained smile, saying 'So... happy...'
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.