your-greatest-weakness
Original: your-greatest-weakness on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Interviewer (an older woman with gray hair, holding a paper): SO, WHAT'S YOUR GREATEST WEAKNESS?
Panel 2:
Job applicant (a man in a white shirt): I DERIVE NO INTRINSIC PLEASURE FROM STATUS-SEEKING OR WEALTH.
Panel 3:
Applicant: I WILL SHOW UP ON TIME AND PERFORM THE TASKS YOU DESIRE BECAUSE THAT IS THE PRICE EXACTED BY SOCIETY IN EXCHANGE FOR THE ABILITY TO EAT FOOD AND DISTRACT MYSELF FROM EXISTENTIAL DREAD ON NIGHTS AND WEEKENDS.
Panel 4:
Applicant: I WILL DO AN UNIMPRESSIVE BUT RELIABLE AMOUNT OF WORK AT A QUALITY THAT WILL NEITHER REQUIRE YOU TO FIRE ME NOR ALLOW ME TO BE PROMOTED OVER YOU.
Panel 5:
Interviewer: SO...
Panel 6:
Interviewer: YOU ARE HIRED AND DO YOU HAVE FRIENDS?
Votey:
A large close-up of the applicant man's face, smiling slightly. Small handwritten text beside him reads: "We are legion."
Interviewer (an older woman with gray hair, holding a paper): SO, WHAT'S YOUR GREATEST WEAKNESS?
Panel 2:
Job applicant (a man in a white shirt): I DERIVE NO INTRINSIC PLEASURE FROM STATUS-SEEKING OR WEALTH.
Panel 3:
Applicant: I WILL SHOW UP ON TIME AND PERFORM THE TASKS YOU DESIRE BECAUSE THAT IS THE PRICE EXACTED BY SOCIETY IN EXCHANGE FOR THE ABILITY TO EAT FOOD AND DISTRACT MYSELF FROM EXISTENTIAL DREAD ON NIGHTS AND WEEKENDS.
Panel 4:
Applicant: I WILL DO AN UNIMPRESSIVE BUT RELIABLE AMOUNT OF WORK AT A QUALITY THAT WILL NEITHER REQUIRE YOU TO FIRE ME NOR ALLOW ME TO BE PROMOTED OVER YOU.
Panel 5:
Interviewer: SO...
Panel 6:
Interviewer: YOU ARE HIRED AND DO YOU HAVE FRIENDS?
Votey:
A large close-up of the applicant man's face, smiling slightly. Small handwritten text beside him reads: "We are legion."
Alt text
A six-panel SMBC comic depicting a job interview. An older gray-haired woman interviewer holding a paper asks a man in a white shirt, "So, what's your greatest weakness?" He replies with brutal honesty: "I derive no intrinsic pleasure from status-seeking or wealth." He continues: "I will show up on time and perform the tasks you desire because that is the price exacted by society in exchange for the ability to eat food and distract myself from existential dread on nights and weekends." Then: "I will do an unimpressive but reliable amount of work at a quality that will neither require you to fire me nor allow me to be promoted over you." The interviewer pauses, looking thoughtful, and says "So..." before declaring, "You are hired and do you have friends?" The joke is that his apathetic, non-threatening honesty makes him the ideal hire and a kindred spirit. Votey (aftercomic): a large close-up of the man's faintly smiling face with small handwritten text reading "We are legion," implying this jaded outlook is shared by a vast multitude of workers.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.