neato
Original: neato on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1 (left): A smiling woman with dark hair speaks excitedly to a man.
Woman: "WHAT? A SELF-ORGANIZING ASSEMBLAGE OF NANOPARTICLES IS SAYING IT'S FALLEN OUT OF LOVE WITH ME?!"
Panel 2 (right): The man speaks back.
Man: "YEAH! A CRYSTAL STRUCTURE OF CALCIUM TITANIUM OXIDE HAS MADE ALL OF MY ENERGY STOCKS WORTHLESS!"
Panel 3 (bottom left): A different scene — someone lying in bed in the dark calls out.
Person in bed: "OH HEY! I'M SLEEPING ALONE FOR THE 102ND NIGHT IN A ROW! WHAT'RE THE ODDS?!"
Panel 4 (bottom right): The woman from earlier smiles serenely, eyes closed, content.
Caption (large text overlaid): "EVERYTHING'S BETTER WITH SCIENCE!"
Votey:
The same woman, now shown close up with a wide unsettling smile, eyes open.
Woman: "Time to read about how to kill them all."
Woman: "WHAT? A SELF-ORGANIZING ASSEMBLAGE OF NANOPARTICLES IS SAYING IT'S FALLEN OUT OF LOVE WITH ME?!"
Panel 2 (right): The man speaks back.
Man: "YEAH! A CRYSTAL STRUCTURE OF CALCIUM TITANIUM OXIDE HAS MADE ALL OF MY ENERGY STOCKS WORTHLESS!"
Panel 3 (bottom left): A different scene — someone lying in bed in the dark calls out.
Person in bed: "OH HEY! I'M SLEEPING ALONE FOR THE 102ND NIGHT IN A ROW! WHAT'RE THE ODDS?!"
Panel 4 (bottom right): The woman from earlier smiles serenely, eyes closed, content.
Caption (large text overlaid): "EVERYTHING'S BETTER WITH SCIENCE!"
Votey:
The same woman, now shown close up with a wide unsettling smile, eyes open.
Woman: "Time to read about how to kill them all."
Alt text
A four-panel comic riffing on the cheerful slogan "Everything's better with science!" by restating ordinary heartbreaks and misfortunes in cold scientific language. Panel 1: a smiling woman exclaims, "What? A self-organizing assemblage of nanoparticles is saying it's fallen out of love with me?!" (i.e., a person dumped her). Panel 2: a man replies, "Yeah! A crystal structure of calcium titanium oxide has made all of my energy stocks worthless!" (a perovskite breakthrough tanked his investments). Panel 3: a figure alone in a dark bed says, "Oh hey! I'm sleeping alone for the 102nd night in a row! What're the odds?!" Panel 4: the woman smiles serenely with eyes closed beside the big overlaid caption "Everything's better with science!" The votey aftercomic shows the same woman in close-up with a wide, slightly manic smile and open eyes, saying, "Time to read about how to kill them all." — turning the upbeat science slogan into a dark vengeful punchline.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.