2015-01-23
Original: 2015-01-23 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Cultist (a person in a dark robe, kneeling before an altar): "Dear Lord Satan, please accept this sacrificial ram."
Panel 2:
Satan (off-panel, red speech bubble): "Aw dammit, guys, that's a goat."
Panel 3:
Cultist: "Right?"
Panel 4:
A second cultist: "They're different?"
Panel 5:
Satan: "A goat isn't a member of Ovis aegagrus. A ram is a male sheep that hasn't been castrated."
Panel 6:
First cultist: "A ram is, like, a boy goat, right?"
Panel 7:
Cultist: "So you still want it or..."
Satan: "No. No animals."
Panel 8:
Satan (a red horned devil, gesturing at the animal): "Why would I want WORK in here anyway? Who told you that?"
Panel 9 (small, bottom):
A round figure / coin-like character laughs: "heh heh heh."
Votey:
An egg-shaped figure (the same round laughing character) sits in tall grass, speech bubble: "SUCK IT!"
Cultist (a person in a dark robe, kneeling before an altar): "Dear Lord Satan, please accept this sacrificial ram."
Panel 2:
Satan (off-panel, red speech bubble): "Aw dammit, guys, that's a goat."
Panel 3:
Cultist: "Right?"
Panel 4:
A second cultist: "They're different?"
Panel 5:
Satan: "A goat isn't a member of Ovis aegagrus. A ram is a male sheep that hasn't been castrated."
Panel 6:
First cultist: "A ram is, like, a boy goat, right?"
Panel 7:
Cultist: "So you still want it or..."
Satan: "No. No animals."
Panel 8:
Satan (a red horned devil, gesturing at the animal): "Why would I want WORK in here anyway? Who told you that?"
Panel 9 (small, bottom):
A round figure / coin-like character laughs: "heh heh heh."
Votey:
An egg-shaped figure (the same round laughing character) sits in tall grass, speech bubble: "SUCK IT!"
Alt text
A nine-panel comic. Robed cultists kneel before an altar in a dark room, presenting a horned animal as a sacrifice. The lead cultist says, "Dear Lord Satan, please accept this sacrificial ram." Satan, an off-panel voice in red, replies, "Aw dammit, guys, that's a goat." The cultists are confused ("Right?" / "They're different?"), and Satan pedantically explains, "A goat isn't a member of Ovis aegagrus. A ram is a male sheep that hasn't been castrated." A cultist guesses, "A ram is, like, a boy goat, right?" When asked if he still wants it, Satan (now shown as a red horned devil gesturing at the animal in a fiery room) refuses: "No. No animals." and complains, "Why would I want WORK in here anyway? Who told you that?" In the final small panel, a round coin-like figure laughs, "heh heh heh." In the votey aftercomic, that same round, egg-shaped character sits gleefully in tall grass shouting "SUCK IT!" — implying it pranked the cultists with bad sacrifice advice. The joke: an internet troll fed the cultists wrong information to annoy Satan with an unwanted, taxonomically incorrect offering.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.