2014-05-11
Original: 2014-05-11 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Red-haired man: HEY!
Dark-haired man: HEY, STEVE.
Panel 2:
Red-haired man: I'M NOT STEVE. I'M JON. REMEMBER, WE MET AT--
Dark-haired man: OH, SORRY. I RAN A COMPRESSION ALGORITHM ON MY BRAIN YESTERDAY.
Panel 3:
Dark-haired man: YOU AND STEVE ARE BOTH SEXUALLY UNAPPEALING, SO I SAVED MEMORY SPACE BY COMBINING YOU INTO ONE PERSON.
Panel 4:
Dark-haired man: SO, WE CAN HANG OUT, BUT YOU'RE DAVE.
Red-haired man: I'M JON. I THOUGHT YOU MERGED ME WITH STEVE.
Panel 5:
Dark-haired man: THIS IS WHY YOU COMP SCI PEOPLE CAN'T REMEMBER FACES, ISN'T IT?
Red-haired man: DON'T MAKE THIS DIFFICULT, STEWART.
Votey:
Red-haired man (off-panel, in speech bubbles): JON. OKAY, BUT I'M SHORTENING THAT TO 'JN'.
(The dark-haired man stares flatly, unimpressed.)
Red-haired man: HEY!
Dark-haired man: HEY, STEVE.
Panel 2:
Red-haired man: I'M NOT STEVE. I'M JON. REMEMBER, WE MET AT--
Dark-haired man: OH, SORRY. I RAN A COMPRESSION ALGORITHM ON MY BRAIN YESTERDAY.
Panel 3:
Dark-haired man: YOU AND STEVE ARE BOTH SEXUALLY UNAPPEALING, SO I SAVED MEMORY SPACE BY COMBINING YOU INTO ONE PERSON.
Panel 4:
Dark-haired man: SO, WE CAN HANG OUT, BUT YOU'RE DAVE.
Red-haired man: I'M JON. I THOUGHT YOU MERGED ME WITH STEVE.
Panel 5:
Dark-haired man: THIS IS WHY YOU COMP SCI PEOPLE CAN'T REMEMBER FACES, ISN'T IT?
Red-haired man: DON'T MAKE THIS DIFFICULT, STEWART.
Votey:
Red-haired man (off-panel, in speech bubbles): JON. OKAY, BUT I'M SHORTENING THAT TO 'JN'.
(The dark-haired man stares flatly, unimpressed.)
Alt text
A five-panel comic. A red-haired man greets a dark-haired man, who calls him "Steve." The red-haired man corrects him: he's Jon. The dark-haired man explains he ran a compression algorithm on his brain and, because both Jon and Steve are "sexually unappealing," merged them into one person to save memory space. He then says they can hang out, but the red-haired man is now "Dave." The red-haired man protests that he's Jon and thought he was merged with Steve. The dark-haired man retorts that this is why comp sci people can't remember faces, and the red-haired man wearily replies, "Don't make this difficult, Stewart." Both men keep getting each other's names wrong. Votey: a close-up of the dark-haired man staring flatly while the red-haired man insists "Jon" and then concedes, "Okay, but I'm shortening that to 'JN'."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.