2013-05-07
Original: 2013-05-07 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1 (narration): In competition between animals, winners typically experience a testosterone boost, while losers get the opposite.
[Image: A snarling lion with red eyes roars at a smaller, cowering lion.]
Panel 2 (narration): This has wide ranging consequences for analysis of hierarchies.
[A line graph. Y-axis labeled TESTOSTERONE, X-axis labeled HIERARCHY RANK. The line slopes steadily downward from upper left to lower right.]
Panel 3 (narration): And terrible consequences for the spouses of biologists.
Woman (holding a vial): According to this blood sample, I won the latest relationship discussion.
Man: The one over whether you can harvest blood samples from me?
Woman: Don't make me win again.
Votey:
Woman (off-panel speech, to a close-up of a worried man's face): According to this eye jelly sample, you'd lose anyway.
[Image: A snarling lion with red eyes roars at a smaller, cowering lion.]
Panel 2 (narration): This has wide ranging consequences for analysis of hierarchies.
[A line graph. Y-axis labeled TESTOSTERONE, X-axis labeled HIERARCHY RANK. The line slopes steadily downward from upper left to lower right.]
Panel 3 (narration): And terrible consequences for the spouses of biologists.
Woman (holding a vial): According to this blood sample, I won the latest relationship discussion.
Man: The one over whether you can harvest blood samples from me?
Woman: Don't make me win again.
Votey:
Woman (off-panel speech, to a close-up of a worried man's face): According to this eye jelly sample, you'd lose anyway.
Alt text
A three-panel SMBC comic. Panel 1: narration reads "In competition between animals, winners typically experience a testosterone boost, while losers get the opposite," shown by a fierce red-eyed lion roaring at a smaller, shrinking lion. Panel 2: narration reads "This has wide ranging consequences for analysis of hierarchies," illustrated by a line graph with TESTOSTERONE on the vertical axis and HIERARCHY RANK on the horizontal axis, the line sloping steadily downward. Panel 3: narration reads "And terrible consequences for the spouses of biologists." A woman holding a vial tells a man, "According to this blood sample, I won the latest relationship discussion." He replies, "The one over whether you can harvest blood samples from me?" She answers, "Don't make me win again." Votey aftercomic: a close-up of a worried man's face as the woman says off-panel, "According to this eye jelly sample, you'd lose anyway" — implying she has also harvested fluid from his eye.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.