2011-10-08
Original: 2011-10-08 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1: A woman with dark hair in a pink top sits at a bar or table across from a clean-shaven man with reddish-brown hair in a blue shirt. Each has a glass of red wine. A dark, snarling bear looms behind the man, its red eye and white teeth showing.
Woman: WELL, I THINK THAT - OH NO, BEAR ATTACK!
Panel 2: The man turns toward the bear, which lunges at him with mouth open. He pushes back.
Bear: RAA U UUGH!
Panel 3: Close-up of the man's face. His face suddenly sprouts a thick, full beard, drawn with red/flame-like motion lines radiating behind his head as the beard erupts.
Panel 4: The man, now fully bearded, faces the bear. The bear appears confused or deterred, recoiling in a doorway.
Panel 5: Close-up of the man's face again, this time the beard is retracting back into his skin, leaving only faint stubble.
Panel 6: Back at the table, the man (clean-shaven again, with light stubble) smiles and gestures with his wine glass toward the woman, resuming the conversation as if nothing happened.
Man: YOU WERE SAYING?
Bottom caption (orange box): AND FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, YOU WERE SAD THAT YOU DIDN'T HAVE A RETRACTABLE BEARD.
Votey: A loose black-and-white sketch of a smiling man's face. On his chin/neck, text reads: LET'S DO IT (with the word 'DO' stylized as an infinity symbol / 'oo').
Woman: WELL, I THINK THAT - OH NO, BEAR ATTACK!
Panel 2: The man turns toward the bear, which lunges at him with mouth open. He pushes back.
Bear: RAA U UUGH!
Panel 3: Close-up of the man's face. His face suddenly sprouts a thick, full beard, drawn with red/flame-like motion lines radiating behind his head as the beard erupts.
Panel 4: The man, now fully bearded, faces the bear. The bear appears confused or deterred, recoiling in a doorway.
Panel 5: Close-up of the man's face again, this time the beard is retracting back into his skin, leaving only faint stubble.
Panel 6: Back at the table, the man (clean-shaven again, with light stubble) smiles and gestures with his wine glass toward the woman, resuming the conversation as if nothing happened.
Man: YOU WERE SAYING?
Bottom caption (orange box): AND FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, YOU WERE SAD THAT YOU DIDN'T HAVE A RETRACTABLE BEARD.
Votey: A loose black-and-white sketch of a smiling man's face. On his chin/neck, text reads: LET'S DO IT (with the word 'DO' stylized as an infinity symbol / 'oo').
Alt text
A six-panel SMBC comic. A woman in pink warns a clean-shaven man on a date, 'Well, I think that - oh no, bear attack!' as a snarling bear looms behind him. The bear lunges ('RAA U UUGH!'). In response, the man instantly sprouts a huge full beard, drawn erupting with flame-like motion lines. The bear, now confused, backs off in a doorway. The man's beard then retracts back into his face, leaving only stubble. Calmly returning to his wine, he says, 'You were saying?' An orange caption box reads: 'And for the rest of your life, you were sad that you didn't have a retractable beard.' Votey: a rough sketch of a grinning man's face with the words 'LET'S DO IT' written across his chin.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.