2011-10-05
Original: 2011-10-05 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Scientist (bald man with glasses): We have landed the marine rover on Enceladus, and we have found LIFE.
Panel 2:
Man (yellow shirt): Is the life scary?
Panel 3:
Scientist: No. It's cute and friendly. There'll probably be Disney movies about it.
Panel 4:
Woman (glasses, pink top): Does the life challenge any of my deeply held spiritual beliefs?
Panel 5:
Scientist: Nope! In fact, it proves them, right!
Panel 6:
Woman: Is there an uncrossable gulf of understanding between our species that casts a shadow of pointlessness over the search for fellow sapients in a vast dark universe?
Panel 7:
Scientist: We thought that might come up, so here's a video.
Panel 8 (video screen, a green cartoon alien on screen):
Alien: Hey everyone! My favorite things are sharing the secret to longevity and great big hugs! Come back soon!
Panel 9:
Woman: So do you think... I don't know, but there really is, we've got funding life on Enceladus? For a mission now!
Votey: A handwritten note reads: "Other places with cute aliens: -Titan -Europa -Ganymede -Inside big new particle accelerators"
Scientist (bald man with glasses): We have landed the marine rover on Enceladus, and we have found LIFE.
Panel 2:
Man (yellow shirt): Is the life scary?
Panel 3:
Scientist: No. It's cute and friendly. There'll probably be Disney movies about it.
Panel 4:
Woman (glasses, pink top): Does the life challenge any of my deeply held spiritual beliefs?
Panel 5:
Scientist: Nope! In fact, it proves them, right!
Panel 6:
Woman: Is there an uncrossable gulf of understanding between our species that casts a shadow of pointlessness over the search for fellow sapients in a vast dark universe?
Panel 7:
Scientist: We thought that might come up, so here's a video.
Panel 8 (video screen, a green cartoon alien on screen):
Alien: Hey everyone! My favorite things are sharing the secret to longevity and great big hugs! Come back soon!
Panel 9:
Woman: So do you think... I don't know, but there really is, we've got funding life on Enceladus? For a mission now!
Votey: A handwritten note reads: "Other places with cute aliens: -Titan -Europa -Ganymede -Inside big new particle accelerators"
Alt text
A vertical SMBC comic. Panel 1: A bald scientist with glasses announces that a marine rover has landed on Enceladus and found LIFE. Panel 2: A man in a yellow shirt asks, "Is the life scary?" Panel 3: The scientist replies it's cute and friendly, and there'll probably be Disney movies about it. Panel 4: A woman with glasses asks whether the life challenges any of her deeply held spiritual beliefs. Panel 5: The scientist says, "Nope! In fact, it proves them, right!" Panel 6: The woman asks if there's an uncrossable gulf of understanding between species that casts a shadow of pointlessness over the search for fellow sapients in a vast dark universe. Panel 7: The scientist says they thought that might come up, so here's a video. Panel 8: A screen shows a smiling green cartoon alien saying its favorite things are sharing the secret to longevity and great big hugs, and to come back soon. Panel 9: The woman, reassured, talks about getting funding for a mission now. The joke: the scientists keep cheerfully pre-empting every existential or spiritual objection to alien life with a too-perfect, marketing-friendly answer. Votey: A handwritten sticky note titled "Other places with cute aliens" lists Titan, Europa, Ganymede, and "inside big new particle accelerators."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.