2011-07-22
Original: 2011-07-22 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1: A well-dressed man speaks to another man.
First man: STOP BEING UNHAPPY! THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO HAVE IT WORSE THAN YOU!
Panel 2: An older man repeats the same line to someone else.
Older man: STOP BEING UNHAPPY! THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO HAVE IT WORSE THAN YOU!
Panel 3: An elderly man again repeats it.
Elderly man: STOP BEING UNHAPPY! THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO HAVE IT WORSE THAN YOU!
Panel 4: A long chain of silhouetted figures, each one pointing/passing the sentiment down the line, snaking across the panel from a small group of people at the top down to the very end.
Panel 5 (bottom of the chain): A miserable-looking figure with flame-like hair sits in a trash can / dumpster, holding a small dog.
Flame-haired figure: WAIT, I'M THE LEAST FORTUNATE MAN ON EARTH?! SO I AUTOMATICALLY WIN EVERY PISSING CONTEST?
Dog: YIP!
Panel 6: The flame-haired figure, now smiling, sits with the dog.
Flame-haired figure: THIS IS THE HAPPIEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Votey:
Handwritten caption: THE MORAL: NO ONE SHOULD HAVE TO BE A GINGER.
First man: STOP BEING UNHAPPY! THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO HAVE IT WORSE THAN YOU!
Panel 2: An older man repeats the same line to someone else.
Older man: STOP BEING UNHAPPY! THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO HAVE IT WORSE THAN YOU!
Panel 3: An elderly man again repeats it.
Elderly man: STOP BEING UNHAPPY! THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO HAVE IT WORSE THAN YOU!
Panel 4: A long chain of silhouetted figures, each one pointing/passing the sentiment down the line, snaking across the panel from a small group of people at the top down to the very end.
Panel 5 (bottom of the chain): A miserable-looking figure with flame-like hair sits in a trash can / dumpster, holding a small dog.
Flame-haired figure: WAIT, I'M THE LEAST FORTUNATE MAN ON EARTH?! SO I AUTOMATICALLY WIN EVERY PISSING CONTEST?
Dog: YIP!
Panel 6: The flame-haired figure, now smiling, sits with the dog.
Flame-haired figure: THIS IS THE HAPPIEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Votey:
Handwritten caption: THE MORAL: NO ONE SHOULD HAVE TO BE A GINGER.
Alt text
A tall SMBC comic. In the first three panels, a series of different men each tell someone the same thing: "Stop being unhappy! There are people who have it worse than you!" The fourth panel shows a long winding chain of black silhouetted figures, each passing that same dismissive sentiment down the line, the chain snaking from a small group at the top all the way to the bottom. At the end of the chain sits the single most unfortunate person on Earth: a dejected figure with flame-like (ginger) hair slumped in a trash dumpster holding a small dog. He realizes, "Wait, I'm the least fortunate man on Earth?! So I automatically win every pissing contest?" In the final panel he is beaming and says, "This is the happiest day of my life." Votey: a handwritten caption reads, "The moral: no one should have to be a ginger."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.