2009-11-23
Original: 2009-11-23 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1: Three bald or balding men stand among burning, ruined houses in the aftermath of an alien attack.
First man (with a scar on his head): "My god... the aliens killed almost everyone."
Second man (in a white tank top, with a tattoo on his shoulder): "Somehow, the only people who survived were foul-mouthed New Jersey thugs."
Third man (in a teal collared shirt): "We've got to rebuild everything. Politics... philosophy... science..."
Panel 2: A red banner reads "500 YEARS LATER...". A bald man stands at a lectern presenting to an audience; a physics diagram with an atom and equations hangs on the wall behind him.
Audience member (a person with blonde hair, foreground): "So, using your methodology, how much mass does a neutron have?"
Presenter: "0.000000013 metric f--ktons."
Votey: A hand-drawn sign titled "CONVERSION TABLE" lists:
"1 metric fuck-ton
= .8988 English fuck-tonnes
= 1.4 Nautical fuck-tons"
First man (with a scar on his head): "My god... the aliens killed almost everyone."
Second man (in a white tank top, with a tattoo on his shoulder): "Somehow, the only people who survived were foul-mouthed New Jersey thugs."
Third man (in a teal collared shirt): "We've got to rebuild everything. Politics... philosophy... science..."
Panel 2: A red banner reads "500 YEARS LATER...". A bald man stands at a lectern presenting to an audience; a physics diagram with an atom and equations hangs on the wall behind him.
Audience member (a person with blonde hair, foreground): "So, using your methodology, how much mass does a neutron have?"
Presenter: "0.000000013 metric f--ktons."
Votey: A hand-drawn sign titled "CONVERSION TABLE" lists:
"1 metric fuck-ton
= .8988 English fuck-tonnes
= 1.4 Nautical fuck-tons"
Alt text
A two-panel SMBC comic. Panel 1: three men stand amid burning, ruined houses after an alien attack. A scarred man says, "My god... the aliens killed almost everyone." A man in a tank top adds, "Somehow, the only people who survived were foul-mouthed New Jersey thugs." A third says they must rebuild everything: politics, philosophy, science. Panel 2: a red banner reads "500 YEARS LATER...". A man lectures at a podium beside a physics diagram of an atom and equations. A blonde audience member asks, "So, using your methodology, how much mass does a neutron have?" He answers, "0.000000013 metric f--ktons" -- the rebuilt science still uses the New Jersey thugs' profane units. Votey: a hand-drawn "CONVERSION TABLE" sign reads: 1 metric fuck-ton = .8988 English fuck-tonnes = 1.4 Nautical fuck-tons.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.