2009-04-27
Original: 2009-04-27 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
A muscular, shirtless blond man wearing only red briefs stands by a doorway, one hand pressed against the doorframe near a wall-mounted coat rack and an umbrella stand. He looks distressed. Three people (a woman with dark hair and two men) watch him from the right.
Blond man: "I NEED SOME TIME TO THINK! IF ANYONE NEEDS ME, I'LL BE AT THE GYM, BENCHPRESSING 300 POUNDS OF JANE AUSTEN NOVELS."
Caption (below panel): Marco finds out he was a genetic experiment to create the perfect husband.
Votey:
The blond man stands with two friends: a bald Black man with a goatee wearing dark sunglasses, and a man with brown hair in a purple shirt also wearing sunglasses.
One of the friends: "CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW WE FEEL? I BROUGHT ICE CREAM AND SOME SEXY BUT WELL-EDUCATED FRIENDS."
A muscular, shirtless blond man wearing only red briefs stands by a doorway, one hand pressed against the doorframe near a wall-mounted coat rack and an umbrella stand. He looks distressed. Three people (a woman with dark hair and two men) watch him from the right.
Blond man: "I NEED SOME TIME TO THINK! IF ANYONE NEEDS ME, I'LL BE AT THE GYM, BENCHPRESSING 300 POUNDS OF JANE AUSTEN NOVELS."
Caption (below panel): Marco finds out he was a genetic experiment to create the perfect husband.
Votey:
The blond man stands with two friends: a bald Black man with a goatee wearing dark sunglasses, and a man with brown hair in a purple shirt also wearing sunglasses.
One of the friends: "CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW WE FEEL? I BROUGHT ICE CREAM AND SOME SEXY BUT WELL-EDUCATED FRIENDS."
Alt text
A muscular, shirtless blond man in red briefs leans against a doorway looking distraught, watched by three onlookers (a dark-haired woman and two men) standing near an umbrella stand. He declares: "I need some time to think! If anyone needs me, I'll be at the gym, benchpressing 300 pounds of Jane Austen novels." The caption reads: "Marco finds out he was a genetic experiment to create the perfect husband." The joke: the engineered "perfect husband" combines hyper-masculine physique with emotional literacy and a love of romance novels. Votey: the blond man stands with two equally idealized friends, one bald with a goatee and one in a purple shirt, both in sunglasses. One says: "Can we talk about how we feel? I brought ice cream and some sexy but well-educated friends." — extending the gag that these perfect husbands are sensitive, supportive, and surrounded by attractive, educated company.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.