ohyesrobot.ordoliberal.com

2006-09-09

Original: 2006-09-09 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal

Transcript

Panel 1 (title card): SMBC PRESENTS A TALE OF SUPERHERODOM "SO-DAMN-AWESOME-MAN"

Panel 2: A bald mugger leans into a car, snatching a purse from an elderly woman with curly gray hair.
Mugger: GIMME YER PURSE! HAHAHA!
A voice (offscreen superhero): NOT SO FAST, CROOK!

Panel 3: A red-haired superhero in a blue and yellow costume marked "DAMN" stands heroically as a yellow blast streaks toward him.
Sound effect: BANG!

Panel 4: The bald mugger, now wounded and clutching his bleeding chest, looks at the hero in shock.
Mugger: OH MY GOD! YOU SHOT ME! BUT... BUT YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE A GUN!

Panel 5: Close-up of the smiling superhero striking a confident pose, hand near his face, cape flowing.

Panel 6: The bald mugger, slumped and bleeding, looks on.
Mugger: THAT IS SO DAMN AWESOME.

Votey:
The dying bald man (close-up of his face): How'd you get so awesome?
The hero (offscreen): Smoking

Alt text

A six-panel SMBC parody of superhero comics titled "SMBC PRESENTS A TALE OF SUPERHERODOM: SO-DAMN-AWESOME-MAN." A bald mugger reaches into a car to grab an elderly woman's purse, shouting "Gimme yer purse! Hahaha!" An offscreen hero calls out "Not so fast, crook!" A red-haired superhero in a blue-and-yellow costume reading "DAMN" poses heroically as a yellow blast ("BANG!") streaks past. The mugger, now clutching a bleeding chest wound, exclaims "Oh my god! You shot me! But... but you don't even have a gun!" The hero just smiles smugly and strikes a glamorous pose. The dying mugger admits, "That is so damn awesome." The joke: the hero is so cool that being shot by him feels awesome despite no visible weapon. Votey aftercomic: in loose hand-drawn lines, the dying mugger's face asks "How'd you get so awesome?" and the hero answers "Smoking" — attributing his lethal coolness to cigarettes.

Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.