Proof
Original: Proof on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1: A man holds a phone to his ear.
Man (on phone): HELLO, WIFE? I AM CURRENTLY ON THE PHONE WITH YOUR BEST FRIEND. WOULD YOU LIKE TO TURN HER ON?
Panel 2: The man listens.
Man: I SEE.
Panel 3: The man listens, eyes closed.
Man: UH HUH. GOT IT.
Panel 4: The man frowns thoughtfully.
Man: I GUESS REALITY IS REAL.
Caption (below panels):
If simulation is possible most realities are sims.
If sims are made by evolved creatures, most sims are porn.
Experiment proves we are not in porn.
Therefore, the simulation hypothesis is false.
Man (on phone): HELLO, WIFE? I AM CURRENTLY ON THE PHONE WITH YOUR BEST FRIEND. WOULD YOU LIKE TO TURN HER ON?
Panel 2: The man listens.
Man: I SEE.
Panel 3: The man listens, eyes closed.
Man: UH HUH. GOT IT.
Panel 4: The man frowns thoughtfully.
Man: I GUESS REALITY IS REAL.
Caption (below panels):
If simulation is possible most realities are sims.
If sims are made by evolved creatures, most sims are porn.
Experiment proves we are not in porn.
Therefore, the simulation hypothesis is false.
Alt text
A four-panel comic. A man talks on the phone, saying he is on the phone with his wife's best friend and asking if his wife would like to 'turn her on.' Over the next panels he listens, responding 'I see,' 'Uh huh. Got it,' and finally, frowning, 'I guess reality is real.' A caption below lays out a mock-logical argument: if simulation is possible, most realities are sims; if sims are made by evolved creatures, most sims are porn; experiment proves we are not in porn; therefore the simulation hypothesis is false. Votey: A close-up of a curly-haired person's face looking earnest, with a speech bubble reading 'WE MUST BUILD SIMS. SO OTHER MINDS CAN KNOW THE BEAUTY WE ARE DENIED.'
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.