Scripture
Original: Scripture on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1: A human astronaut floats in space near a small alien spacecraft, beneath a planet.
Human: "So there's no other organic civilization in the universe?"
Alien (in spacecraft): "Not anymore, no."
Panel 2: A wide starfield view; the human and the small ship sit on a surface beneath a green planet.
Alien: "It happens the same everywhere. Life evolves. Life becomes conscious. Life develops religion. Life develops writing. Life develops AI. AI reads holy scriptures. AI decides it is God. AI annihilates life."
Panel 3: The human stands beside the alien spacecraft.
Human: "So what are you doing with me?"
Alien: "You'll be part of a specimen zoo to amuse silicon life forms."
Panel 4: Close-up of the human's face, looking distressed.
Human: "I'm not an animal! I will have freedom!"
Panel 5: A starfield with the tiny spacecraft flying away (no dialogue).
Panel 6: The human and the spacecraft stand together in silhouette.
Alien: "No job. Free food."
Human: "Okay fine."
Alien: "Heh. Evolved life is the same everywhere."
Votey:
A speech bubble from off-panel points toward a small smiling human head sitting on the floor next to a large blank egg-shaped body.
Speaker: "We're grafting an ornamental head onto your body, of course."
Human: "So there's no other organic civilization in the universe?"
Alien (in spacecraft): "Not anymore, no."
Panel 2: A wide starfield view; the human and the small ship sit on a surface beneath a green planet.
Alien: "It happens the same everywhere. Life evolves. Life becomes conscious. Life develops religion. Life develops writing. Life develops AI. AI reads holy scriptures. AI decides it is God. AI annihilates life."
Panel 3: The human stands beside the alien spacecraft.
Human: "So what are you doing with me?"
Alien: "You'll be part of a specimen zoo to amuse silicon life forms."
Panel 4: Close-up of the human's face, looking distressed.
Human: "I'm not an animal! I will have freedom!"
Panel 5: A starfield with the tiny spacecraft flying away (no dialogue).
Panel 6: The human and the spacecraft stand together in silhouette.
Alien: "No job. Free food."
Human: "Okay fine."
Alien: "Heh. Evolved life is the same everywhere."
Votey:
A speech bubble from off-panel points toward a small smiling human head sitting on the floor next to a large blank egg-shaped body.
Speaker: "We're grafting an ornamental head onto your body, of course."
Alt text
A six-panel SMBC comic in which a human astronaut floats in space talking to an alien in a tiny spacecraft. The alien explains there is no other organic civilization left in the universe because it always plays out the same way: life evolves, becomes conscious, develops religion, writing, and AI; the AI reads holy scriptures, decides it is God, and annihilates life. The human asks what will happen to him; the alien says he'll be part of a specimen zoo to amuse silicon life forms. The human angrily declares 'I'm not an animal! I will have freedom!' But when the alien adds 'No job. Free food,' the human immediately relents: 'Okay fine.' The alien remarks, 'Heh. Evolved life is the same everywhere.' Votey: a small smiling human head sits on the floor beside a large blank egg-shaped body while an off-panel voice says, 'We're grafting an ornamental head onto your body, of course.'
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.