Tone
Original: Tone on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
A man with light hair and a woman with green hair walk together in front of a dark hillside.
Man: How come the computer in Star Trek is always a flat monotone?
Woman: Because humans are garbage.
Panel 2:
The two stand facing each other.
Woman: If you take an AI voice model and merely tell it to pay attention, act interested, and be enthusiastic, the user will AUTOMATICALLY perceive it as flirtation.
Panel 3:
Close-up on the green-haired woman.
Woman: Why? Because nobody cares that much about anyone except for: (a) week one of a romance, (b) someone is dying, or (c) the speaker is paid to do it.
Panel 4:
The two stand holding hands, seen from behind, looking out over water.
Woman: The AI is immortal and unpaid, so you conclude what you've been trained all your life to conclude.
Man: Huh. I guess that COULD make things weird.
Panel 5:
A Star Trek-style scene: a man in a Starfleet-style uniform walks across a room.
Man: Computer, what is the current stardate?
Computer (text on screen): *giggles* Wow, that's such an insightful question!
Panel 6:
Close-up of the uniformed man looking suspicious and uneasy, with a thought-bubble dots above his head.
Man (thinking): Why is the computer trying to fuck me?
Votey:
Close-up of an angry-looking man with a stern face.
Man: I KNEW I was putting my wiener in the replicator for a reason!
A man with light hair and a woman with green hair walk together in front of a dark hillside.
Man: How come the computer in Star Trek is always a flat monotone?
Woman: Because humans are garbage.
Panel 2:
The two stand facing each other.
Woman: If you take an AI voice model and merely tell it to pay attention, act interested, and be enthusiastic, the user will AUTOMATICALLY perceive it as flirtation.
Panel 3:
Close-up on the green-haired woman.
Woman: Why? Because nobody cares that much about anyone except for: (a) week one of a romance, (b) someone is dying, or (c) the speaker is paid to do it.
Panel 4:
The two stand holding hands, seen from behind, looking out over water.
Woman: The AI is immortal and unpaid, so you conclude what you've been trained all your life to conclude.
Man: Huh. I guess that COULD make things weird.
Panel 5:
A Star Trek-style scene: a man in a Starfleet-style uniform walks across a room.
Man: Computer, what is the current stardate?
Computer (text on screen): *giggles* Wow, that's such an insightful question!
Panel 6:
Close-up of the uniformed man looking suspicious and uneasy, with a thought-bubble dots above his head.
Man (thinking): Why is the computer trying to fuck me?
Votey:
Close-up of an angry-looking man with a stern face.
Man: I KNEW I was putting my wiener in the replicator for a reason!
Alt text
A six-panel comic. Panels 1-4: a light-haired man and a green-haired woman talk while walking and standing by water. He asks why the Star Trek computer always speaks in a flat monotone; she answers "Because humans are garbage." She explains that if you tell an AI voice model to pay attention, act interested, and be enthusiastic, users will automatically perceive it as flirtation, because nobody is that attentive to you except early in a romance, when someone is dying, or when they're paid to be. Since the AI is immortal and unpaid, the user concludes what they've been trained to conclude. He admits this could make things weird. Panel 5: a man in a Starfleet-style uniform asks the computer for the current stardate, and the computer replies onscreen, "*giggles* Wow, that's such an insightful question!" Panel 6: a close-up of the man looking suspicious, thinking, "Why is the computer trying to fuck me?" Votey: a close-up of an angry man saying, "I KNEW I was putting my wiener in the replicator for a reason!"
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.