Crack
Original: Crack on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Robot (a tall rounded robot near a doorway): YOUR TIME OF TRAVAIL IS OVER, HUMAN. FROM NOW ON WE MACHINES WILL DO THE LABOR, WHILE YOU ENJOY THE PLEASURES OF MOVEMENT, NATURE, LEARNING, FRIENDSHIP, LOVE, AND COMMUNITY.
Man (a man with orange flame-like hair): NICE TRY, ROBOT!
Panel 2:
Man (eyes closed, hand on chest): MY SENSE OF SELF-WORTH IS CONSTRUCTED ENTIRELY FROM MY ABILITY TO USE UP MY HEALTH AND LIFESPAN TO SUPPORT LOVED ONES AND DISPLAY STATUS TO RIVALS.
Panel 3:
Man (holding a pickaxe, facing a rock): NO SIR, I'M JUST GONNA KEEP ON CRACKING ROCKS, THANK YOU VERY MUCH. YOU JUST KEEP YOUR LEISURE TO YOURSELF.
Panel 4:
First robot (to a second, smaller treaded robot): WHY. WHY ARE THEY LIKE THIS?
Second robot: THEY HAD A LONG ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP WITH EVOLUTION.
(The man stands nearby holding an axe, looking troubled.)
Votey:
A close-up of the man's face, sad and teary-eyed.
Man: THIS IS LOVE.
Robot (a tall rounded robot near a doorway): YOUR TIME OF TRAVAIL IS OVER, HUMAN. FROM NOW ON WE MACHINES WILL DO THE LABOR, WHILE YOU ENJOY THE PLEASURES OF MOVEMENT, NATURE, LEARNING, FRIENDSHIP, LOVE, AND COMMUNITY.
Man (a man with orange flame-like hair): NICE TRY, ROBOT!
Panel 2:
Man (eyes closed, hand on chest): MY SENSE OF SELF-WORTH IS CONSTRUCTED ENTIRELY FROM MY ABILITY TO USE UP MY HEALTH AND LIFESPAN TO SUPPORT LOVED ONES AND DISPLAY STATUS TO RIVALS.
Panel 3:
Man (holding a pickaxe, facing a rock): NO SIR, I'M JUST GONNA KEEP ON CRACKING ROCKS, THANK YOU VERY MUCH. YOU JUST KEEP YOUR LEISURE TO YOURSELF.
Panel 4:
First robot (to a second, smaller treaded robot): WHY. WHY ARE THEY LIKE THIS?
Second robot: THEY HAD A LONG ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP WITH EVOLUTION.
(The man stands nearby holding an axe, looking troubled.)
Votey:
A close-up of the man's face, sad and teary-eyed.
Man: THIS IS LOVE.
Alt text
A four-panel SMBC comic in a barren landscape. Panel 1: A rounded robot tells an orange-haired man, "Your time of travail is over, human. From now on we machines will do the labor, while you enjoy the pleasures of movement, nature, learning, friendship, love, and community." The man replies, "Nice try, robot!" Panel 2: The man, eyes closed and hand on his chest, says, "My sense of self-worth is constructed entirely from my ability to use up my health and lifespan to support loved ones and display status to rivals." Panel 3: Holding a pickaxe at a rock, he says, "No sir, I'm just gonna keep on cracking rocks, thank you very much. You just keep your leisure to yourself." Panel 4: One robot asks another, "Why. Why are they like this?" The other answers, "They had a long abusive relationship with evolution," as the man stands holding an axe, looking troubled. Votey: A close-up of the man's sad, teary face as he says, "This is love."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.