humanness
Original: humanness on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Man: Robot, it's weird to listen to you. Your speech is perfect, but it lacks all the subtle tones that indicate humanness.
Robot: I'm sorry, hold on.
Panel 2 (close-up on the robot):
Robot: Ummm, the ummm, well the, [squishy phlegmy noises], umm, [suppressed burp], um, uh, [loud swallowing]
Panel 3:
Man: STOP IT!
Man: You KNOW I don't like your human-talk impression.
Panel 4 (the two walking away over a hill, seen from a distance):
Robot: Well it KILLS at robot comedy night.
Votey:
Robot (in a large speech bubble, standing alone): How about I just magnify all the noises your face makes and play them back for you so you can feel what it's like to be me?
Man: Robot, it's weird to listen to you. Your speech is perfect, but it lacks all the subtle tones that indicate humanness.
Robot: I'm sorry, hold on.
Panel 2 (close-up on the robot):
Robot: Ummm, the ummm, well the, [squishy phlegmy noises], umm, [suppressed burp], um, uh, [loud swallowing]
Panel 3:
Man: STOP IT!
Man: You KNOW I don't like your human-talk impression.
Panel 4 (the two walking away over a hill, seen from a distance):
Robot: Well it KILLS at robot comedy night.
Votey:
Robot (in a large speech bubble, standing alone): How about I just magnify all the noises your face makes and play them back for you so you can feel what it's like to be me?
Alt text
A four-panel SMBC comic. A man with reddish hair and a robot with a rounded blue-green head walk together outdoors. Panel 1: The man says the robot's speech is perfect but lacks the subtle tones that indicate humanness; the robot replies, "I'm sorry, hold on." Panel 2: Close-up on the robot, which produces a stream of gross human-mouth sounds described in brackets: "Ummm, the ummm, well the, [squishy phlegmy noises], umm, [suppressed burp], um, uh, [loud swallowing]." Panel 3: The man yells "STOP IT! You KNOW I don't like your human-talk impression." Panel 4: Seen from far away on a hill, the robot says, "Well it KILLS at robot comedy night." Votey aftercomic: The robot stands alone with a large speech bubble saying, "How about I just magnify all the noises your face makes and play them back for you so you can feel what it's like to be me?"
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.