ding-dong
Original: ding-dong on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1
Elderly man (in bed): WHEN I DIE... I JUST HOPE SOME DESERVING YOUNG PERSON GETS MY DONG.
Panel 2
Woman (seated beside the bed): WE KNOW DAD. YOU WROTE "INCLUDING MY DONG" ON EVERY PAGE OF THE ORGAN DONATION PAPERWORK.
Panel 3
Woman (off-panel, over a black/silhouette scene of the bedside): THE ILLUSTRATIONS WERE VERY UPSETTING.
Panel 4
Elderly man: IF IT'S TOO HUGE FOR THE BODY OF ANY RECEIVER I HOPE IT CAN BE PLASTICIZED AND USED TO EDUCATE AND INSPIRE COLLEGE STUDENTS.
Woman: WE ARE CREMATING YOU STARTING AT THE WAIST.
Votey:
Elderly man (speech bubble): I SHALL RISE LIKE THE PHOENIX!
(Wordless final panels: the man lies in bed; the woman performs the cremation, beginning at his waist.)
Elderly man (in bed): WHEN I DIE... I JUST HOPE SOME DESERVING YOUNG PERSON GETS MY DONG.
Panel 2
Woman (seated beside the bed): WE KNOW DAD. YOU WROTE "INCLUDING MY DONG" ON EVERY PAGE OF THE ORGAN DONATION PAPERWORK.
Panel 3
Woman (off-panel, over a black/silhouette scene of the bedside): THE ILLUSTRATIONS WERE VERY UPSETTING.
Panel 4
Elderly man: IF IT'S TOO HUGE FOR THE BODY OF ANY RECEIVER I HOPE IT CAN BE PLASTICIZED AND USED TO EDUCATE AND INSPIRE COLLEGE STUDENTS.
Woman: WE ARE CREMATING YOU STARTING AT THE WAIST.
Votey:
Elderly man (speech bubble): I SHALL RISE LIKE THE PHOENIX!
(Wordless final panels: the man lies in bed; the woman performs the cremation, beginning at his waist.)
Alt text
A four-panel SMBC comic. An elderly man with a gray mustache lies in a hospital-style bed talking to his adult daughter, who sits at his bedside in front of a window showing a city skyline. Panel 1, the man: "When I die... I just hope some deserving young person gets my dong." Panel 2, the daughter: "We know Dad. You wrote 'including my dong' on every page of the organ donation paperwork." Panel 3 is a black silhouette of the man lying in bed; the daughter says off-panel, "The illustrations were very upsetting." Panel 4, the man: "If it's too huge for the body of any receiver I hope it can be plasticized and used to educate and inspire college students." The daughter, hand on her face, deadpans: "We are cremating you. Starting at the waist." In the bonus votey panel the man declares from a speech bubble, "I shall rise like the phoenix!" while a wordless sketch shows him in bed and the daughter beginning to cremate him, starting at the waist.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.