sad-4
Original: sad-4 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
A woman with blue hair in a red shirt is talking with a tall robot.
Panel 1 (woman):
Woman: Robot, I'm sad.
Panel 2 (robot):
Robot: I'm sorry.
Panel 3 (robot, large speech):
Robot: Have you considered rationally assessing that the odds of your bare existence are so minuscule that you should thank the cosmos for the kiss of the sun on your cheek and the caress of wind from distant seas?
Panel 4 (woman):
Woman: Nah.
Panel 5 (woman):
Woman: I can't do that. My emotions have inertia. I can feel sad now entirely because I was sad yesterday.
Panel 6 (robot):
Robot: Why didn't humans evolve a direct way to manipulate their mental circuitry?
Panel 7 (woman):
Woman: Because we would press the happy and sex buttons 24 hours a day until we died.
Panel 8 (robot):
Robot: Ah.
Panel 9 (robot, large speech):
Robot: I guess that's why whenever we make a man-machine hybrid cyborg it runs away and we find its naked corpse 3 days later.
Panel 10 (woman, alarmed, leaning forward):
Woman: Wait, you can do that?! Borg my ass!
Votey:
The robot stands alone with a speech bubble.
Robot: Why do they always say that?
Panel 1 (woman):
Woman: Robot, I'm sad.
Panel 2 (robot):
Robot: I'm sorry.
Panel 3 (robot, large speech):
Robot: Have you considered rationally assessing that the odds of your bare existence are so minuscule that you should thank the cosmos for the kiss of the sun on your cheek and the caress of wind from distant seas?
Panel 4 (woman):
Woman: Nah.
Panel 5 (woman):
Woman: I can't do that. My emotions have inertia. I can feel sad now entirely because I was sad yesterday.
Panel 6 (robot):
Robot: Why didn't humans evolve a direct way to manipulate their mental circuitry?
Panel 7 (woman):
Woman: Because we would press the happy and sex buttons 24 hours a day until we died.
Panel 8 (robot):
Robot: Ah.
Panel 9 (robot, large speech):
Robot: I guess that's why whenever we make a man-machine hybrid cyborg it runs away and we find its naked corpse 3 days later.
Panel 10 (woman, alarmed, leaning forward):
Woman: Wait, you can do that?! Borg my ass!
Votey:
The robot stands alone with a speech bubble.
Robot: Why do they always say that?
Alt text
An SMBC comic. A woman with blue hair in a red shirt talks with a tall, smooth, rounded robot. She says, "Robot, I'm sad." The robot replies, "I'm sorry," then asks whether she has considered rationally assessing that the odds of her bare existence are so minuscule that she should thank the cosmos for the kiss of the sun on her cheek and the caress of wind from distant seas. She flatly answers, "Nah," explaining that her emotions have inertia: she feels sad now entirely because she was sad yesterday. The robot wonders why humans didn't evolve a direct way to manipulate their own mental circuitry. She explains, "Because we would press the happy and sex buttons 24 hours a day until we died." The robot says, "Ah," then muses that this must be why whenever they make a man-machine hybrid cyborg, it runs away and they find its naked corpse three days later. Alarmed, the woman leans forward and exclaims, "Wait, you can do that?! Borg my ass!" Votey: The robot stands alone, asking, "Why do they always say that?"
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.