prayer-4
Original: prayer-4 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Man (praying, eyes closed): Dear God, grant me a life of indulgence and gratification. Give me rights without duties, relationships without obligations, power without responsibility. Gimme all of that immediately and without effort. Amen.
Panel 2:
Off-panel voice (interrupting): What about the sense of worth born of striving against the impossible?
Man: Hm?
Panel 3:
Man: I... is someone listening?
Panel 4:
Man: Why are you starting in with this striving bullshit when it's just you and me? I'm not trying to impress anyone.
Panel 5:
Off-panel voice: Don't you derive some meaning from-
Man: Is the room bugged? I'm pretty sure I'm alone.
Panel 6:
Off-panel voice: I'm talking about the personal esteem-
Man (annoyed, hand raised): If anyone is listening I am in favor of personal struggle and so forth!
Panel 7:
Man: Okay, I want people to love me for who I am while I love them for what they do for me.
Off-panel voice: I cannot WAIT to give you to Satan.
Votey:
A bearded old man (revealed to be Satan, smiling) speaks.
Satan: Joke's on you, God! I can't afford any vices!
Man (praying, eyes closed): Dear God, grant me a life of indulgence and gratification. Give me rights without duties, relationships without obligations, power without responsibility. Gimme all of that immediately and without effort. Amen.
Panel 2:
Off-panel voice (interrupting): What about the sense of worth born of striving against the impossible?
Man: Hm?
Panel 3:
Man: I... is someone listening?
Panel 4:
Man: Why are you starting in with this striving bullshit when it's just you and me? I'm not trying to impress anyone.
Panel 5:
Off-panel voice: Don't you derive some meaning from-
Man: Is the room bugged? I'm pretty sure I'm alone.
Panel 6:
Off-panel voice: I'm talking about the personal esteem-
Man (annoyed, hand raised): If anyone is listening I am in favor of personal struggle and so forth!
Panel 7:
Man: Okay, I want people to love me for who I am while I love them for what they do for me.
Off-panel voice: I cannot WAIT to give you to Satan.
Votey:
A bearded old man (revealed to be Satan, smiling) speaks.
Satan: Joke's on you, God! I can't afford any vices!
Alt text
A six-panel SMBC comic. A bearded man kneels with eyes closed and prays: "Dear God, grant me a life of indulgence and gratification. Give me rights without duties, relationships without obligations, power without responsibility. Gimme all of that immediately and without effort. Amen." An off-panel voice keeps interrupting, asking about "the sense of worth born of striving against the impossible," deriving meaning, and personal esteem. The man, confused then irritated, brushes each one off: "Is someone listening?", "Why are you starting in with this striving bullshit when it's just you and me? I'm not trying to impress anyone," "Is the room bugged? I'm pretty sure I'm alone," and finally throws up a hand: "If anyone is listening I am in favor of personal struggle and so forth!" He then says he wants people to love him for who he is while he loves them for what they do for him. The off-panel voice replies dryly, "I cannot WAIT to give you to Satan." Votey (bonus panel): A close-up of a grinning bearded old man (Satan) saying, "Joke's on you, God! I can't afford any vices!"
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.