dread
Original: dread on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Man (with red/orange hair): Robot, can you make me happy?
Robot: Yeah, easy.
Panel 2:
Robot: Every human has at least one source of crippling dread they've never spoken of, perhaps not even to themselves. Am I beautiful? Am I loved? Has my life been valuable? I just use this scanner to determine what your secret dread is and then I validate you.
Panel 3:
Robot (scanning the man, who looks anxious): Your father loved you.
Panel 4:
Man: Really?!
Panel 5:
Robot: See, easy.
Panel 6:
Man: Now, allay my dread of death.
Robot: No can do, future corpse.
Votey:
A close-up of the man's face, distressed.
Man: Stop calling me that!
Man (with red/orange hair): Robot, can you make me happy?
Robot: Yeah, easy.
Panel 2:
Robot: Every human has at least one source of crippling dread they've never spoken of, perhaps not even to themselves. Am I beautiful? Am I loved? Has my life been valuable? I just use this scanner to determine what your secret dread is and then I validate you.
Panel 3:
Robot (scanning the man, who looks anxious): Your father loved you.
Panel 4:
Man: Really?!
Panel 5:
Robot: See, easy.
Panel 6:
Man: Now, allay my dread of death.
Robot: No can do, future corpse.
Votey:
A close-up of the man's face, distressed.
Man: Stop calling me that!
Alt text
A six-panel comic. A red-haired man asks a yellow-eyed robot, 'Robot, can you make me happy?' The robot replies, 'Yeah, easy,' then explains that every human has at least one source of crippling dread they've never spoken of, even to themselves, with worries like 'Am I beautiful? Am I loved? Has my life been valuable?' The robot says it uses a scanner to find a person's secret dread and then validate them. It scans the now-anxious man and tells him, 'Your father loved you.' The man, moved, asks 'Really?!' The robot says, 'See, easy.' The man then demands, 'Now, allay my dread of death,' and the robot flatly refuses: 'No can do, future corpse.' Votey (aftercomic): a close-up of the man's distressed face as he shouts, 'Stop calling me that!'
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.