ethics-3
Original: ethics-3 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Woman: Ethical philosophy is pointless. It's simple. Work hard and do right.
Child: Are you crazy?
Panel 2:
Woman: Suppose at some point in the future I'm going to turn evil. If so, all of my industriousness and all of my reputation building will vastly INCREASE my ability to do harm!
Panel 3:
Woman: If there's any risk of villainy in my future, the most ethical behavior is to become a mooching layabout!
Panel 4:
Woman: And if you're SURE you're one day going to go evil, it is ethically incumbent upon you to never work hard or do right or in any way acquire the respect of your fellows.
Panel 5 (silhouette panel, two figures on a hillside at dusk):
Child: So...
Child: I plan to go into ethical philosophy.
Votey:
A grinning, somewhat unsettling close-up face says: Once I get tenure, I can really focus on my passion for wickedness.
Woman: Ethical philosophy is pointless. It's simple. Work hard and do right.
Child: Are you crazy?
Panel 2:
Woman: Suppose at some point in the future I'm going to turn evil. If so, all of my industriousness and all of my reputation building will vastly INCREASE my ability to do harm!
Panel 3:
Woman: If there's any risk of villainy in my future, the most ethical behavior is to become a mooching layabout!
Panel 4:
Woman: And if you're SURE you're one day going to go evil, it is ethically incumbent upon you to never work hard or do right or in any way acquire the respect of your fellows.
Panel 5 (silhouette panel, two figures on a hillside at dusk):
Child: So...
Child: I plan to go into ethical philosophy.
Votey:
A grinning, somewhat unsettling close-up face says: Once I get tenure, I can really focus on my passion for wickedness.
Alt text
A five-panel SMBC comic. In the first panels, a woman talks earnestly to a small child. She argues that ethical philosophy is pointless because you should just work hard and do right. The child asks if she's crazy. She continues: suppose she's going to turn evil in the future—then all her hard work and good reputation would only increase her ability to do harm. So if there's any risk of villainy in her future, the most ethical thing is to become a lazy mooching layabout, and if you're SURE you'll go evil, you must never work hard or earn anyone's respect. The final panel is a dramatic black silhouette of the two figures standing on a hillside at dusk. The child deadpans, 'So... I plan to go into ethical philosophy,' turning the woman's reasoning into a self-aware joke about choosing the lazy field. Votey: a creepy grinning close-up face declares, 'Once I get tenure, I can really focus on my passion for wickedness.'
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.