before
Original: before on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1 (title bar): BEFORE KIDS
Man with red hair, standing in a grocery store freezer aisle, a yellow "SALE!" tag visible on the shelf: "My God, who buys microwave burritos? They come out like red hot cardboard with frozen beef jerky inside."
Panel 2 (title bar): AFTER KIDS
The same man, now with long unkempt hair and a full beard, looking haggard and holding a microwave burrito up to his face: "My God! These are the exact diameter of my food-hole!"
Votey:
The bearded, exhausted man continues, gazing at the burrito: "It's a hole cylinder... filled with eat-stuff!"
Man with red hair, standing in a grocery store freezer aisle, a yellow "SALE!" tag visible on the shelf: "My God, who buys microwave burritos? They come out like red hot cardboard with frozen beef jerky inside."
Panel 2 (title bar): AFTER KIDS
The same man, now with long unkempt hair and a full beard, looking haggard and holding a microwave burrito up to his face: "My God! These are the exact diameter of my food-hole!"
Votey:
The bearded, exhausted man continues, gazing at the burrito: "It's a hole cylinder... filled with eat-stuff!"
Alt text
A two-panel SMBC comic contrasting life before and after kids. Panel 1, labeled "BEFORE KIDS," shows a tidy red-haired man in a grocery freezer aisle (with a "SALE!" tag) scoffing: "My God, who buys microwave burritos? They come out like red hot cardboard with frozen beef jerky inside." Panel 2, labeled "AFTER KIDS," shows the same man transformed into a haggard, long-haired, bearded wreck clutching a burrito to his face and exclaiming with delight: "My God! These are the exact diameter of my food-hole!" The joke is parenthood reducing his standards to pure exhausted efficiency. The votey (aftercomic) is a close-up of the same depleted bearded man staring at the burrito, adding: "It's a hole cylinder... filled with eat-stuff!"
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.