genie
Original: genie on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Genie (a green genie emerging from a lamp): And you are forbidden to use your wishes to raise the dead.
Panel 2:
Woman (with blonde hair): That's fine. I want a precise duplicate of my dead boyfriend, not raised from the grave, just an atom-for-atom copy, unaware of how it was created.
Panel 3:
Genie (looking skeptical): No. No! If he's exactly the same, philosophically it's raising the dead!
Woman (small reply): I am.
Panel 4:
Woman (off-panel, silhouette): Bigger dong, then.
Votey:
Genie: You know what...? No. You get a zombie boyfriend.
Genie (a green genie emerging from a lamp): And you are forbidden to use your wishes to raise the dead.
Panel 2:
Woman (with blonde hair): That's fine. I want a precise duplicate of my dead boyfriend, not raised from the grave, just an atom-for-atom copy, unaware of how it was created.
Panel 3:
Genie (looking skeptical): No. No! If he's exactly the same, philosophically it's raising the dead!
Woman (small reply): I am.
Panel 4:
Woman (off-panel, silhouette): Bigger dong, then.
Votey:
Genie: You know what...? No. You get a zombie boyfriend.
Alt text
A four-panel comic. Panel 1: A green genie rises from a lamp and tells a blonde woman, "And you are forbidden to use your wishes to raise the dead." Panel 2: The woman replies, "That's fine. I want a precise duplicate of my dead boyfriend, not raised from the grave, just an atom-for-atom copy, unaware of how it was created." Panel 3: The genie scowls and objects, "No. No! If he's exactly the same, philosophically it's raising the dead!" The woman quietly answers, "I am." Panel 4: Shown in silhouette, the woman counters, "Bigger dong, then." Votey aftercomic: The genie, exasperated, says, "You know what...? No. You get a zombie boyfriend."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.