closure
Original: closure on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1
Woman (Sheila): Thanks for doing this, Sheila. I know we'll never be together again, but I just want closure. Why Sheila, why do we fall out of love?
Panel 2
Woman (Sheila): You're mean, petty, cruel, selfish, arrogant, and you cheated on me. So I decided to leave you.
Man: I just feel like I'm not getting the closure I need.
Panel 3
Woman (Sheila): I do not love you and I never will love you.
Man: I just don't feel closed. I feel unclosed and I want to close this part of my life.
Panel 4
Woman (Sheila): I would rather claw my eyes out so I can never see your face. I never feel your touch.
Man: Sheila, I'm just trying to move on, to close this chapter of my life.
Panel 5
Man: I guess what I'm trying to get here is closure.
Votey:
Man: Can we still sleep together?
Woman (Sheila): Sleep together?
(The man sits hunched and dejected; the woman has walked away into the distance.)
Woman (Sheila): Thanks for doing this, Sheila. I know we'll never be together again, but I just want closure. Why Sheila, why do we fall out of love?
Panel 2
Woman (Sheila): You're mean, petty, cruel, selfish, arrogant, and you cheated on me. So I decided to leave you.
Man: I just feel like I'm not getting the closure I need.
Panel 3
Woman (Sheila): I do not love you and I never will love you.
Man: I just don't feel closed. I feel unclosed and I want to close this part of my life.
Panel 4
Woman (Sheila): I would rather claw my eyes out so I can never see your face. I never feel your touch.
Man: Sheila, I'm just trying to move on, to close this chapter of my life.
Panel 5
Man: I guess what I'm trying to get here is closure.
Votey:
Man: Can we still sleep together?
Woman (Sheila): Sleep together?
(The man sits hunched and dejected; the woman has walked away into the distance.)
Alt text
A five-panel SMBC comic. A man and a woman sit across a table. The woman, Sheila, repeatedly and bluntly tells the man she will never love him again, listing his faults (mean, petty, cruel, selfish, arrogant, a cheater) and saying she'd rather claw her eyes out than see his face. In each panel the man, oblivious to her hostility, keeps responding only that he 'just wants closure' and to 'close this chapter of my life,' mistaking her clear rejection for an open question. The joke: he treats her devastating breakup speech as if it isn't already the closure he keeps asking for. Votey (bonus panel): the dejected, hunched man asks 'Can we still sleep together?' as the woman walks away into the distance; she replies incredulously, 'Sleep together?'
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.