loans
Original: loans on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
A sign reads: NO-CREDIT LOANS
Behind a desk at the loan stand sits a small dark-haired child (the lender). A red-haired person approaches.
Red-haired person: HI, I'D LIKE TO APPLY FOR TEN DOLLARS.
Panel 2:
Lender: FOR WHAT REASON?
Panel 3:
Red-haired person: I WANT THIS MANY GUMBALLS.
Panel 4:
Lender: THAT SOUNDS LIKE A STRONG INVESTMENT. DO YOU PROMISE TO PAY IT BACK?
Red-haired person: NAH.
Panel 5:
Lender (gesturing): THAT'S OKAY. YOU CAN HAVE IT ANYWAY.
Red-haired person: WOW, REALLY?
Panel 6:
Lender: WE'RE 100% GUARANTEED BY THE LOCAL GOVERNMENT.
Off-panel voice: SALLY! GIVE ME BACK MY PURSE!
The dark-haired child (Sally) sits looking guilty/sheepish.
Votey:
A large smiling cartoon face leans in.
Face: BUT I'M TOO BIG TO FAIL!
A sign reads: NO-CREDIT LOANS
Behind a desk at the loan stand sits a small dark-haired child (the lender). A red-haired person approaches.
Red-haired person: HI, I'D LIKE TO APPLY FOR TEN DOLLARS.
Panel 2:
Lender: FOR WHAT REASON?
Panel 3:
Red-haired person: I WANT THIS MANY GUMBALLS.
Panel 4:
Lender: THAT SOUNDS LIKE A STRONG INVESTMENT. DO YOU PROMISE TO PAY IT BACK?
Red-haired person: NAH.
Panel 5:
Lender (gesturing): THAT'S OKAY. YOU CAN HAVE IT ANYWAY.
Red-haired person: WOW, REALLY?
Panel 6:
Lender: WE'RE 100% GUARANTEED BY THE LOCAL GOVERNMENT.
Off-panel voice: SALLY! GIVE ME BACK MY PURSE!
The dark-haired child (Sally) sits looking guilty/sheepish.
Votey:
A large smiling cartoon face leans in.
Face: BUT I'M TOO BIG TO FAIL!
Alt text
A six-panel SMBC comic. A small dark-haired child runs a stand with a sign reading 'NO-CREDIT LOANS.' A red-haired person walks up and says, 'Hi, I'd like to apply for ten dollars.' The child lender asks the reason; the applicant says, 'I want this many gumballs.' The lender replies, 'That sounds like a strong investment. Do you promise to pay it back?' and the applicant answers, 'Nah.' The lender says it's okay, they can have the money anyway, and when the applicant asks 'Wow, really?', the lender explains, 'We're 100% guaranteed by the local government.' In the final panel an off-panel voice shouts, 'Sally! Give me back my purse!' and the child lender, named Sally, sits looking sheepish, having funded the 'loan' with stolen money. Votey (aftercomic): a large grinning cartoon face leans in and declares, 'But I'm too big to fail!'
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.