terrible-news
Original: terrible-news on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Man: HONEY! I HAVE TERRIBLE NEWS!
Panel 2:
Woman: I'VE COME TO REALIZE THE ENTIRE WORLD IS A FANTASY! I'M IN A COMA, AND I'VE DREAMT ALL OF IT!
Panel 3:
Woman: THIS CITY, THIS COUNTRY, EVERYTHING!
Panel 4:
Woman: I'M JUST... IMAGINED? I'M SOME SORT OF PROGRAM IN A MAMMAL'S BRAIN?
Panel 5 (caption above): NONE OF THIS IS REAL?!
Man: MY GOD... WHAT DOES IT MEAN? WHAT DO I DO?
Panel 6:
Woman: YOU FETCH ME MY LAPTOP AND MAKE ME PANCAKES OR I'LL PINCH MYSELF REAL HARD.
Votey:
Woman (close-up, looking annoyed): Bring me the mayor.
Man: HONEY! I HAVE TERRIBLE NEWS!
Panel 2:
Woman: I'VE COME TO REALIZE THE ENTIRE WORLD IS A FANTASY! I'M IN A COMA, AND I'VE DREAMT ALL OF IT!
Panel 3:
Woman: THIS CITY, THIS COUNTRY, EVERYTHING!
Panel 4:
Woman: I'M JUST... IMAGINED? I'M SOME SORT OF PROGRAM IN A MAMMAL'S BRAIN?
Panel 5 (caption above): NONE OF THIS IS REAL?!
Man: MY GOD... WHAT DOES IT MEAN? WHAT DO I DO?
Panel 6:
Woman: YOU FETCH ME MY LAPTOP AND MAKE ME PANCAKES OR I'LL PINCH MYSELF REAL HARD.
Votey:
Woman (close-up, looking annoyed): Bring me the mayor.
Alt text
A six-panel SMBC comic. Panel 1: a man turns to a red-haired woman and exclaims, "HONEY! I HAVE TERRIBLE NEWS!" Panels 2-4: the woman, wide-eyed and distressed, declares that she has come to realize the entire world is a fantasy, that she is in a coma and has dreamt all of it -- this city, this country, everything -- and that she herself may be imagined, just some sort of program in a mammal's brain, none of it real. Panel 5: the man, alarmed, asks, "MY GOD... WHAT DOES IT MEAN? WHAT DO I DO?" Panel 6: the woman, now looking calm and slightly smug, replies, "YOU FETCH ME MY LAPTOP AND MAKE ME PANCAKES OR I'LL PINCH MYSELF REAL HARD." -- she's using her supposed godlike realization to boss him around. Votey (aftercomic): a close-up of the woman looking irritated, saying, "Bring me the mayor."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.