why-has-no-one-invented-this
Original: why-has-no-one-invented-this on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Title (above comic): WHY HAS NO ONE MADE THIS?
Panel 1: STEP 1: 3D SCAN YOUR FACE WHILE YELLING.
(A woman with reddish hair is shown with her mouth open mid-yell, a scanning beam of light projected onto her face.)
Panel 2: STEP 2: 3D PRINT TINY VERSION OF OWN HEAD.
(A small printed head, mouth open in a yell, sits being fabricated by a printer beam.)
Panel 3: STEP 3: ATTACH TO MOUTHGUARD WITH HINGE.
(A close-up of an open mouth; the tiny printed head is mounted inside on a hinged mouthguard.)
Panel 4: STEP 4: GO ON DATE WITH NEW PERSON.
Man: "YOU HAVE PRETTY HAIR."
(A man in a suit speaks to the red-haired woman across a table.)
Panel 5: STEP 5: EXECUTE "THE ALIEN."
Woman: "5KRAAAA!!"
(The woman screams open-mouthed, alien-style, the tiny screaming head revealed inside her mouth.)
Votey:
Man (grinning widely): "MY FETISH!"
Panel 1: STEP 1: 3D SCAN YOUR FACE WHILE YELLING.
(A woman with reddish hair is shown with her mouth open mid-yell, a scanning beam of light projected onto her face.)
Panel 2: STEP 2: 3D PRINT TINY VERSION OF OWN HEAD.
(A small printed head, mouth open in a yell, sits being fabricated by a printer beam.)
Panel 3: STEP 3: ATTACH TO MOUTHGUARD WITH HINGE.
(A close-up of an open mouth; the tiny printed head is mounted inside on a hinged mouthguard.)
Panel 4: STEP 4: GO ON DATE WITH NEW PERSON.
Man: "YOU HAVE PRETTY HAIR."
(A man in a suit speaks to the red-haired woman across a table.)
Panel 5: STEP 5: EXECUTE "THE ALIEN."
Woman: "5KRAAAA!!"
(The woman screams open-mouthed, alien-style, the tiny screaming head revealed inside her mouth.)
Votey:
Man (grinning widely): "MY FETISH!"
Alt text
A vertical SMBC comic titled "WHY HAS NO ONE MADE THIS?" presenting a five-step instructional joke. Step 1: "3D scan your face while yelling" — a red-haired woman's open-mouthed face is scanned by a beam of light. Step 2: "3D print tiny version of own head" — a miniature screaming head is fabricated. Step 3: "Attach to mouthguard with hinge" — close-up of the tiny head mounted on a hinged mouthguard inside an open mouth. Step 4: "Go on date with new person" — a man in a suit tells the woman, "You have pretty hair." Step 5: "Execute 'The Alien'" — the woman screams "5KRAAAA!!" and the tiny screaming head juts out of her mouth like the creature from the movie Alien. Votey: a close-up of the man grinning ecstatically, saying "My fetish!"
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.