know-your-linguistic-philosophies
Original: know-your-linguistic-philosophies on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Title banner: KNOW YOUR LINGUISTIC PHILOSOPHIES!
Panel 1 (labeled PRESCRIPTIVIST):
A woman with dark hair: "Language is like gymnastics. There are rules and standards and those who fail to follow them should be chastised."
Panel 2 (labeled DESCRIPTIVIST):
A man with light hair: "Language is like gymnastics. There are lots of forms and none is preferable to any other."
Panel 3 (labeled PRAGMATIST):
A woman with dark hair: "There isn't a best gymnastics, but many of you are really really shitty at gymnastics."
Votey:
Text across the top: "ESPECIALLY YOU"
A large frowning face glares down with a disapproving, judgmental expression.
Panel 1 (labeled PRESCRIPTIVIST):
A woman with dark hair: "Language is like gymnastics. There are rules and standards and those who fail to follow them should be chastised."
Panel 2 (labeled DESCRIPTIVIST):
A man with light hair: "Language is like gymnastics. There are lots of forms and none is preferable to any other."
Panel 3 (labeled PRAGMATIST):
A woman with dark hair: "There isn't a best gymnastics, but many of you are really really shitty at gymnastics."
Votey:
Text across the top: "ESPECIALLY YOU"
A large frowning face glares down with a disapproving, judgmental expression.
Alt text
A four-panel SMBC comic titled "KNOW YOUR LINGUISTIC PHILOSOPHIES!" Each panel labels a school of thought and has a character compare language to gymnastics. Panel 1, PRESCRIPTIVIST: a dark-haired woman says language is like gymnastics, with rules and standards, and those who fail to follow them should be chastised. Panel 2, DESCRIPTIVIST: a light-haired man says language is like gymnastics, with lots of forms, none preferable to any other. Panel 3, PRAGMATIST: a dark-haired woman says there isn't a best gymnastics, but many of you are really really shitty at gymnastics. The votey (bonus panel) shows a large frowning, glaring face with the words "ESPECIALLY YOU" across the top, pointing the insult directly at the reader.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.