2014-12-31
Original: 2014-12-31 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Daddy (a girl's father, glasses, off-panel/close-up): Daddy, why do people in old paintings have one hand tucked inside their shirts?
Panel 2:
Daddy: Photos were once expensive back then. So, if you needed a picture of yourself, what you'd do is point a gun at a painter and make him paint your portrait.
Panel 3:
Daddy: But nobody wants a portrait of himself pointing a gun, so people would hide the gun in their coats while being painted.
Panel 4:
Little girl: How does Daddy know so much about EVERYTHING?
Caption box: Daddy's mouth is a cesspool of lies.
Votey:
(No text — an old-master oil portrait of a man in a military uniform with one hand tucked inside his white waistcoat, in the style of classic portraits of Napoleon.)
Daddy (a girl's father, glasses, off-panel/close-up): Daddy, why do people in old paintings have one hand tucked inside their shirts?
Panel 2:
Daddy: Photos were once expensive back then. So, if you needed a picture of yourself, what you'd do is point a gun at a painter and make him paint your portrait.
Panel 3:
Daddy: But nobody wants a portrait of himself pointing a gun, so people would hide the gun in their coats while being painted.
Panel 4:
Little girl: How does Daddy know so much about EVERYTHING?
Caption box: Daddy's mouth is a cesspool of lies.
Votey:
(No text — an old-master oil portrait of a man in a military uniform with one hand tucked inside his white waistcoat, in the style of classic portraits of Napoleon.)
Alt text
A four-panel SMBC comic. A little girl asks her bespectacled father, "Daddy, why do people in old paintings have one hand tucked inside their shirts?" He explains that photos were once expensive, so to get your picture made you would point a gun at a painter and force him to paint your portrait. But since nobody wants a portrait of themselves holding a gun, people hid the gun inside their coats while being painted. In the final panel the girl thinks, "How does Daddy know so much about EVERYTHING?" while a caption reads, "Daddy's mouth is a cesspool of lies." Votey: a classic old-master oil portrait of a man in military uniform with one hand tucked into his waistcoat (Napoleon-style), illustrating the joke's premise that the hidden hand is concealing a gun.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.