2014-08-28
Original: 2014-08-28 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Shirtless man (John): Hey baby, you... what the hell is that?
(A large dark silhouette of an armored figure looms on the left.)
Panel 2:
Woman in a metallic powered exo-suit: A sexoskeleton.
Panel 3:
Woman in suit: With this suit, I can sex FOUR times as fast, TWELVE times as hard. I can lift two THOUSAND kilograms of erotically charged flesh.
(She grins triumphantly with arms raised.)
Panel 4:
John: It sounds like you just selected easily measured metrics and increased them rather than trying to make the experience good.
Woman in suit: That's called PROGRESS, John.
Votey:
Woman in the exo-suit strikes a dynamic pose, fist clenched.
Woman: ACTIVATE SEX LASER!
(A zigzag laser beam shoots out toward the right.)
Shirtless man (John): Hey baby, you... what the hell is that?
(A large dark silhouette of an armored figure looms on the left.)
Panel 2:
Woman in a metallic powered exo-suit: A sexoskeleton.
Panel 3:
Woman in suit: With this suit, I can sex FOUR times as fast, TWELVE times as hard. I can lift two THOUSAND kilograms of erotically charged flesh.
(She grins triumphantly with arms raised.)
Panel 4:
John: It sounds like you just selected easily measured metrics and increased them rather than trying to make the experience good.
Woman in suit: That's called PROGRESS, John.
Votey:
Woman in the exo-suit strikes a dynamic pose, fist clenched.
Woman: ACTIVATE SEX LASER!
(A zigzag laser beam shoots out toward the right.)
Alt text
A four-panel SMBC comic. Panel 1: A shirtless man stands at right looking alarmed at a large dark armored silhouette looming at left, saying "Hey baby, you... what the hell is that?" Panel 2: The figure is revealed as a woman wearing a bulky metallic powered exo-suit; she answers "A sexoskeleton." Panel 3: Grinning with arms raised, she boasts, "With this suit, I can sex FOUR times as fast, TWELVE times as hard. I can lift two THOUSAND kilograms of erotically charged flesh." Panel 4: The man, named John, replies flatly, "It sounds like you just selected easily measured metrics and increased them rather than trying to make the experience good." She retorts, "That's called PROGRESS, John." Votey: The woman in the exo-suit strikes a heroic battle pose, fist clenched, declaring "ACTIVATE SEX LASER!" as a jagged laser beam fires out to the side.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.