2011-12-14
Original: 2011-12-14 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Title text (above the panels): Exigology (noun): A statement whose converse is its own explanation.
Panel 1: A man with red hair, a red beard, and round glasses against a green background.
Man: POLITICIANS NEVER DO WHAT MY GROUP WANTS, SO I NEVER VOTE.
Panel 2: A man with long dark messy hair, a dark beard, and a tank top against an orange background.
Man: GIRLS AREN'T INTERESTED IN ME, SO I DON'T SEE WHY I SHOULD CARE ABOUT HYGIENE.
Panel 3: A person with long dark hair in a red sweater typing on a laptop against a purple background.
Person: I'M TERRIBLE AT THIS, SO I'M NOT EVEN GONNA TRY.
Panel 4: An older shirtless man with gray hair against a dark background, clutching a pile of sandwiches.
Man: LIFE IS SHORT, SO I'M EATING AS MANY BACON SALAD SANDWICHES AS POSSIBLE.
Votey:
A black-and-white panel showing a person hunched over, writing at a desk.
Person: I'M LONELY, SO I SIT AROUND MAKING UP WORDS.
Panel 1: A man with red hair, a red beard, and round glasses against a green background.
Man: POLITICIANS NEVER DO WHAT MY GROUP WANTS, SO I NEVER VOTE.
Panel 2: A man with long dark messy hair, a dark beard, and a tank top against an orange background.
Man: GIRLS AREN'T INTERESTED IN ME, SO I DON'T SEE WHY I SHOULD CARE ABOUT HYGIENE.
Panel 3: A person with long dark hair in a red sweater typing on a laptop against a purple background.
Person: I'M TERRIBLE AT THIS, SO I'M NOT EVEN GONNA TRY.
Panel 4: An older shirtless man with gray hair against a dark background, clutching a pile of sandwiches.
Man: LIFE IS SHORT, SO I'M EATING AS MANY BACON SALAD SANDWICHES AS POSSIBLE.
Votey:
A black-and-white panel showing a person hunched over, writing at a desk.
Person: I'M LONELY, SO I SIT AROUND MAKING UP WORDS.
Alt text
A four-panel SMBC comic titled with a fake dictionary definition: "Exigology (noun): A statement whose converse is its own explanation." Each panel shows a different person making a self-defeating, circular statement. Panel 1, a red-haired bearded man with glasses on a green background: "Politicians never do what my group wants, so I never vote." Panel 2, a disheveled long-haired man in a tank top on an orange background: "Girls aren't interested in me, so I don't see why I should care about hygiene." Panel 3, a person at a laptop on a purple background: "I'm terrible at this, so I'm not even gonna try." Panel 4, an older shirtless man clutching a pile of sandwiches on a dark background: "Life is short, so I'm eating as many bacon salad sandwiches as possible." The joke is that in each case the stated reason and its reverse explain each other in a self-reinforcing loop. Votey (a small black-and-white bonus panel): a lonely person hunched over a desk writing, saying "I'm lonely, so I sit around making up words" — a self-referential nod to inventing the word "exigology."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.