2011-01-26
Original: 2011-01-26 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Man with red/flame-like hair (back to viewer): WHY IS IT ILLEGAL TO OPEN A CASINO IN MY HOUSE?
Man with glasses and green shirt (holding an open book): GAMBLING TENDS TO ATTRACT SCUMMY ANTISOCIAL BUSINESSMEN.
Panel 2:
Red-haired man: WELL THEN HOW COME THE GOVERNMENT GETS TO RUN A LOTTERY?
Panel 3 (man with glasses shown looking troubled, no dialogue)
Panel 4 (close-up of red-haired man's face, no dialogue)
Panel 5:
Red-haired man (now wide-eyed, dawning realization): WHOOOAAAA...
Votey:
Heading: WHAT SHOULD HAPPEN IF YOU WIN THE LOTTERY:
Body text: Congratulations! If you wish to receive your winnings, you must write an accurate mathematical explanation of why it was still a bad idea for you to play the lottery.
Man with red/flame-like hair (back to viewer): WHY IS IT ILLEGAL TO OPEN A CASINO IN MY HOUSE?
Man with glasses and green shirt (holding an open book): GAMBLING TENDS TO ATTRACT SCUMMY ANTISOCIAL BUSINESSMEN.
Panel 2:
Red-haired man: WELL THEN HOW COME THE GOVERNMENT GETS TO RUN A LOTTERY?
Panel 3 (man with glasses shown looking troubled, no dialogue)
Panel 4 (close-up of red-haired man's face, no dialogue)
Panel 5:
Red-haired man (now wide-eyed, dawning realization): WHOOOAAAA...
Votey:
Heading: WHAT SHOULD HAPPEN IF YOU WIN THE LOTTERY:
Body text: Congratulations! If you wish to receive your winnings, you must write an accurate mathematical explanation of why it was still a bad idea for you to play the lottery.
Alt text
A five-panel comic. A red-haired man asks another man (glasses, green shirt, holding a book) why it's illegal to open a casino in his house. The bespectacled man answers that gambling tends to attract scummy antisocial businessmen. The red-haired man counters: then how come the government gets to run a lottery? The bespectacled man looks troubled and says nothing. In close-up, the red-haired man's expression shifts, then his eyes go wide with a dawning realization as he says 'WHOOOAAAA...' The joke: he's just realized the government running the lottery makes it the scummy antisocial business. Votey (aftercomic): a hand-drawn box titled 'WHAT SHOULD HAPPEN IF YOU WIN THE LOTTERY:' with the text 'Congratulations! If you wish to receive your winnings, you must write an accurate mathematical explanation of why it was still a bad idea for you to play the lottery.'
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.