2010-11-03
Original: 2010-11-03 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Title: RELATIONSHIPS: A GUIDE
The comic is a graph/chart. The horizontal X-axis runs from "HATE" (left) to "LOVE" (right). The vertical Y-axis is labeled "AMOUNT OF SEX" (increasing upward). A large dome/semicircle arcs from the bottom-left corner to the bottom-right corner.
The chart background is divided into colored regions, defined by a legend at the bottom:
- Gray: Boring
- Light red/pink: Good
- Light blue: Bad
- Dark red: Island of Awesome
The gray "Boring" region fills the dome's interior. The pink "Good" region is the upper-right area outside the dome. The blue "Bad" region is the upper-left area outside the dome. A small dark-red "Island of Awesome" circle sits in the top-left corner.
Labeled points on the chart:
- Top-left corner, inside the dark-red Island of Awesome: "YOU CAN'T PUT THAT THERE" and "OH MY GOD PUT THAT THERE"
- Top of the Y-axis (high sex, neutral love): "FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS"
- Top-right corner (high sex, high love): "IDEAL RELATIONSHIP"
- Middle of the Y-axis: "MOST COUPLES YOU WILL EVER MEET"
- Right side, mid-low: "PLATONIC LOVE, BUT THEN WE GOT DRUNK"
- Bottom-right, just inside the love corner: "PLATONIC LOVE"
- Center-low on the Y-axis: "FRIENDS WITH SHITTY BENEFITS"
- Bottom-center, lowest sex: "IMAGINARY GIRLFRIEND"
- Bottom-left corner (high hate, low sex): "THANK YOU, DADDY ISSUES" and just below it "PLATONIC HATE"
Votey:
Caption: "ZACH, ABOUT 3 HOURS INTO SMBC BEING DOWN"
A crying, distraught man.
Man: "I HAVE NO PURPOSE"
The comic is a graph/chart. The horizontal X-axis runs from "HATE" (left) to "LOVE" (right). The vertical Y-axis is labeled "AMOUNT OF SEX" (increasing upward). A large dome/semicircle arcs from the bottom-left corner to the bottom-right corner.
The chart background is divided into colored regions, defined by a legend at the bottom:
- Gray: Boring
- Light red/pink: Good
- Light blue: Bad
- Dark red: Island of Awesome
The gray "Boring" region fills the dome's interior. The pink "Good" region is the upper-right area outside the dome. The blue "Bad" region is the upper-left area outside the dome. A small dark-red "Island of Awesome" circle sits in the top-left corner.
Labeled points on the chart:
- Top-left corner, inside the dark-red Island of Awesome: "YOU CAN'T PUT THAT THERE" and "OH MY GOD PUT THAT THERE"
- Top of the Y-axis (high sex, neutral love): "FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS"
- Top-right corner (high sex, high love): "IDEAL RELATIONSHIP"
- Middle of the Y-axis: "MOST COUPLES YOU WILL EVER MEET"
- Right side, mid-low: "PLATONIC LOVE, BUT THEN WE GOT DRUNK"
- Bottom-right, just inside the love corner: "PLATONIC LOVE"
- Center-low on the Y-axis: "FRIENDS WITH SHITTY BENEFITS"
- Bottom-center, lowest sex: "IMAGINARY GIRLFRIEND"
- Bottom-left corner (high hate, low sex): "THANK YOU, DADDY ISSUES" and just below it "PLATONIC HATE"
Votey:
Caption: "ZACH, ABOUT 3 HOURS INTO SMBC BEING DOWN"
A crying, distraught man.
Man: "I HAVE NO PURPOSE"
Alt text
A hand-drawn chart titled "RELATIONSHIPS: A GUIDE." The X-axis goes from HATE (left) to LOVE (right); the Y-axis is AMOUNT OF SEX, increasing upward. A large gray dome arcs across the chart. A color legend reads: gray = Boring, pink = Good, blue = Bad, dark red = Island of Awesome. Inside the gray dome (Boring) are plotted points: "MOST COUPLES YOU WILL EVER MEET" (middle), "FRIENDS WITH SHITTY BENEFITS" (center-low), and "IMAGINARY GIRLFRIEND" (bottom, lowest sex). Outside the dome to the upper right (pink, Good) sit "FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS" (high sex), "IDEAL RELATIONSHIP" (high sex and high love), "PLATONIC LOVE, BUT THEN WE GOT DRUNK," and "PLATONIC LOVE." The bottom-left hate corner holds "THANK YOU, DADDY ISSUES" and "PLATONIC HATE." A tiny dark-red circle in the top-left corner, the "Island of Awesome," is labeled "YOU CAN'T PUT THAT THERE / OH MY GOD PUT THAT THERE." Votey (aftercomic): captioned "ZACH, ABOUT 3 HOURS INTO SMBC BEING DOWN," a man cries miserably and says "I HAVE NO PURPOSE."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.