2010-05-20
Original: 2010-05-20 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Caption: PROFESSOR THORNE REALIZED TIME TRAVEL IS POSSIBLE IN THIS UNIVERSE.
(A bald, bearded professor stands in front of a chalkboard/screen covered in general-relativity equations, e.g. c²dτ² = c²dt²(1 - GM/2c²r)² / (1 + GM/2c²r)² ... = dr²/(1 - r_s/r) + r²dφ²)
Panel 2:
Caption: BUT HE WONDERED WHERE ALL THE TIME TRAVELERS WERE.
(A thought-bubble silhouette of a head.)
Panel 3:
Caption: SO PROFESSOR THORNE THREW THE MOST PERFECT PARTY IN HISTORY.
(The professor stands behind a table with food and a sign reading BEER / CHEESE.)
Panel 4:
Caption: SURE ENOUGH, THEY BEGAN TO SHOW UP.
(A red costumed/armored figure appears.)
Panel 5:
Caption: IN FACT, EVERYONE WHO EVER FIGURED OUT TIME TRAVEL SHOWED UP.
(A crowd of varied figures fills the panel.)
Panel 6:
Caption: THEY SHOWED UP SO FAST, THE PARTY COULDN'T HOLD THEM.
(A doorway/wall with a sign reading something like "AM 12:01" / ABC, packed.)
Panel 7:
Caption: THE CRUSH OF PEOPLE WAS SO DENSE, IT BECAME A BLACK HOLE.
(A black circle/black hole against the dark panel.)
Panel 8:
Caption: TIME TRAVEL IS NO LONGER POSSIBLE IN THIS UNIVERSE.
(Earth seen from space against a starfield.)
Votey:
A man in a top hat and trench coat, eyes closed, says: "CHEESE AND BEER, YOU SAY?"
Caption: PROFESSOR THORNE REALIZED TIME TRAVEL IS POSSIBLE IN THIS UNIVERSE.
(A bald, bearded professor stands in front of a chalkboard/screen covered in general-relativity equations, e.g. c²dτ² = c²dt²(1 - GM/2c²r)² / (1 + GM/2c²r)² ... = dr²/(1 - r_s/r) + r²dφ²)
Panel 2:
Caption: BUT HE WONDERED WHERE ALL THE TIME TRAVELERS WERE.
(A thought-bubble silhouette of a head.)
Panel 3:
Caption: SO PROFESSOR THORNE THREW THE MOST PERFECT PARTY IN HISTORY.
(The professor stands behind a table with food and a sign reading BEER / CHEESE.)
Panel 4:
Caption: SURE ENOUGH, THEY BEGAN TO SHOW UP.
(A red costumed/armored figure appears.)
Panel 5:
Caption: IN FACT, EVERYONE WHO EVER FIGURED OUT TIME TRAVEL SHOWED UP.
(A crowd of varied figures fills the panel.)
Panel 6:
Caption: THEY SHOWED UP SO FAST, THE PARTY COULDN'T HOLD THEM.
(A doorway/wall with a sign reading something like "AM 12:01" / ABC, packed.)
Panel 7:
Caption: THE CRUSH OF PEOPLE WAS SO DENSE, IT BECAME A BLACK HOLE.
(A black circle/black hole against the dark panel.)
Panel 8:
Caption: TIME TRAVEL IS NO LONGER POSSIBLE IN THIS UNIVERSE.
(Earth seen from space against a starfield.)
Votey:
A man in a top hat and trench coat, eyes closed, says: "CHEESE AND BEER, YOU SAY?"
Alt text
An eight-panel SMBC comic. Panel 1: a bald, bearded professor stands before a board of general-relativity equations; caption: "Professor Thorne realized time travel is possible in this universe." Panel 2: a silhouette of a head in thought; caption: "But he wondered where all the time travelers were." Panel 3: the professor behind a table with a sign reading BEER and CHEESE; caption: "So Professor Thorne threw the most perfect party in history." Panel 4: a red costumed figure arrives; caption: "Sure enough, they began to show up." Panel 5: a dense crowd of varied figures; caption: "In fact, everyone who ever figured out time travel showed up." Panel 6: a packed doorway; caption: "They showed up so fast, the party couldn't hold them." Panel 7: a black circle; caption: "The crush of people was so dense, it became a black hole." Panel 8: Earth in space; caption: "Time travel is no longer possible in this universe." Votey: a close-up of a man in a top hat and trench coat, eyes closed, saying "Cheese and beer, you say?" — a future time traveler intrigued by the party that will doom time travel.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.