2008-04-18
Original: 2008-04-18 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
A bald, terrified patient in a green shirt holds his hands up, eyes squeezed shut, screaming. A doctor in a white coat (with a head mirror) leans over him, pulling a tourniquet tight around the patient's neck.
Patient: IT'S JUST A CUT ON THE EAR! IT'S JUST A CUT ON THE EAR!
Doctor: SHUTUP! I'M A DOCTOR!
Caption below panel:
Lesson learned:
Tourniquets work better on limbs.
Votey:
A crudely drawn legless torso lies on the ground. A speech bubble points to it.
Voice (off-panel): I think we can save everything below the neck
A bald, terrified patient in a green shirt holds his hands up, eyes squeezed shut, screaming. A doctor in a white coat (with a head mirror) leans over him, pulling a tourniquet tight around the patient's neck.
Patient: IT'S JUST A CUT ON THE EAR! IT'S JUST A CUT ON THE EAR!
Doctor: SHUTUP! I'M A DOCTOR!
Caption below panel:
Lesson learned:
Tourniquets work better on limbs.
Votey:
A crudely drawn legless torso lies on the ground. A speech bubble points to it.
Voice (off-panel): I think we can save everything below the neck
Alt text
Main comic: A panicked bald patient in a green shirt throws up his hands and screams, "It's just a cut on the ear! It's just a cut on the ear!" A confident doctor in a white coat and head mirror cinches a tourniquet tight around the patient's neck, snapping, "Shut up! I'm a doctor!" Caption beneath: "Lesson learned: Tourniquets work better on limbs." Votey: A crude doodle of a legless human torso lying on the ground, with a speech bubble declaring, "I think we can save everything below the neck" — implying the neck tourniquet killed the patient while the rest of the body remains fine.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.