2005-05-27
Original: 2005-05-27 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Teacher (a woman with orange hair, holding a stack of papers): CLASS, I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT I DIDN'T USE THE LETTER-BASED SYSTEM TO GRADE YOUR PAPERS. I THINK IT'S A SILLY, UNREALISTIC METHOD. I MEAN, YOU CAN'T JUST BOIL AN INDIVIDUAL DOWN TO AN A- OR A B+, CAN YOU?
Teacher: ANYWAY, HERE ARE YOUR PAPERS. BILLY ANDERSON?
Billy (a student): HERE!
Panel 2:
(Close-up of a graded paper. Header reads "BILLY" and "Essay." Scrawled across it in large red handwriting:) STUPID! STUPID! STUPID!
Votey:
(A graded paper with red handwriting:) also, your hair sucks
Teacher (a woman with orange hair, holding a stack of papers): CLASS, I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT I DIDN'T USE THE LETTER-BASED SYSTEM TO GRADE YOUR PAPERS. I THINK IT'S A SILLY, UNREALISTIC METHOD. I MEAN, YOU CAN'T JUST BOIL AN INDIVIDUAL DOWN TO AN A- OR A B+, CAN YOU?
Teacher: ANYWAY, HERE ARE YOUR PAPERS. BILLY ANDERSON?
Billy (a student): HERE!
Panel 2:
(Close-up of a graded paper. Header reads "BILLY" and "Essay." Scrawled across it in large red handwriting:) STUPID! STUPID! STUPID!
Votey:
(A graded paper with red handwriting:) also, your hair sucks
Alt text
A four-panel-feeling SMBC comic. In the top panel, an orange-haired teacher holding a stack of papers addresses her class: "Class, I want you to know that I didn't use the letter-based system to grade your papers. I think it's a silly, unrealistic method. I mean, you can't just boil an individual down to an A- or a B+, can you? Anyway, here are your papers. Billy Anderson?" A student replies "Here!" Below, a close-up reveals Billy's graded essay, which instead of a letter grade has "STUPID! STUPID! STUPID!" scrawled across it in large red handwriting. The joke: her supposedly more humane grading is actually just blunt insults. Votey: another close-up of the marked-up paper with red handwriting reading "also, your hair sucks," piling a personal jab on top.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.