ohyesrobot.ordoliberal.com

2004-05-02

Original: 2004-05-02 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal

Transcript

Panel 1:
A blond man in a green shirt and blue pants stands menacingly, pointing down at a bound, balding man with orange hair who is tied to a chair with his hands cuffed behind him.
Blond man: "YOU LIKE BEING MY HOSTAGE, FATTY? HUH? YOU LIKE IT?"

Caption (below the panel): I could deal with the indignity, the abuse. Because, deep down, it wasn't the words that hurt the most, it was the daily tire iron beatings.

Votey:
A close-up of a man's face, looking flat or unimpressed.
Man: "SETTING ME ON FIRE? DICK MOVE."

Alt text

Main comic, single panel: A blond man in a green shirt looms over and points at a balding, orange-haired man who is bound and handcuffed to a chair. The blond man taunts, "You like being my hostage, fatty? Huh? You like it?" A caption beneath the panel reads: "I could deal with the indignity, the abuse. Because, deep down, it wasn't the words that hurt the most, it was the daily tire iron beatings." The joke: the narrator brushes off the verbal cruelty entirely, treating the literal daily tire-iron beatings as the real problem. Votey: a deadpan close-up of a man's face who says, "Setting me on fire? Dick move." — again downplaying horrific abuse as a mere social faux pas.

Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.