Poseidon
Original: Poseidon on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Man (rising from the water, startled): POSEIDON!
Panel 2:
Poseidon (a large bearded figure): HEY! I'M JUST HERE TO SAY THANKS FOR ALL YOUR PROPITIATORY OFFERINGS!
Man (standing in the shallows): HUH?
Panel 3:
Poseidon: BACK IN THE ANCIENT TIMES, THE BEST I EVER GOT WAS SOME RINGS OR SUNKEN SHIPS. NOW I GET VALUABLE PLASTICS, RARE METALS, COMPUTERS, LITERAL MEGATONS OF FOOD!
Panel 4:
Poseidon (now wearing a crown fashioned from an upside-down Fritos bag): IT'S AMAZING!
Panel 5:
Man (uncertain): YOU... ARE... WELCOME.
Panel 6 (silhouettes on a dark shore):
Poseidon (a small figure at right): SPEAKING OF WHICH, ANY CHANCE OF SOME MORE PETROLEUM?
Man (at left): OH... I'M SURE IT WON'T BE TOO LONG.
Votey:
Caption (in a thought/speech bubble above a simple line-drawn figure): BOY THE SKY GODS MUST LOVE US.
Man (rising from the water, startled): POSEIDON!
Panel 2:
Poseidon (a large bearded figure): HEY! I'M JUST HERE TO SAY THANKS FOR ALL YOUR PROPITIATORY OFFERINGS!
Man (standing in the shallows): HUH?
Panel 3:
Poseidon: BACK IN THE ANCIENT TIMES, THE BEST I EVER GOT WAS SOME RINGS OR SUNKEN SHIPS. NOW I GET VALUABLE PLASTICS, RARE METALS, COMPUTERS, LITERAL MEGATONS OF FOOD!
Panel 4:
Poseidon (now wearing a crown fashioned from an upside-down Fritos bag): IT'S AMAZING!
Panel 5:
Man (uncertain): YOU... ARE... WELCOME.
Panel 6 (silhouettes on a dark shore):
Poseidon (a small figure at right): SPEAKING OF WHICH, ANY CHANCE OF SOME MORE PETROLEUM?
Man (at left): OH... I'M SURE IT WON'T BE TOO LONG.
Votey:
Caption (in a thought/speech bubble above a simple line-drawn figure): BOY THE SKY GODS MUST LOVE US.
Alt text
A six-panel SMBC comic. A red-haired man wading in the sea is startled by Poseidon, a huge bearded god rising from the water. Poseidon cheerfully says he's just there to thank the man for all the 'propitiatory offerings.' The confused man says 'Huh?' Poseidon explains that back in ancient times the best he got was rings or sunken ships, but now he receives valuable plastics, rare metals, computers, and 'literal megatons of food' — he declares it amazing while wearing a makeshift crown made from an upside-down Fritos bag. The man warily replies 'You... are... welcome.' In the final dark panel, shown as silhouettes on a shore, Poseidon casually asks for 'some more petroleum,' and the man answers, 'Oh... I'm sure it won't be too long.' The joke: humanity's pollution of the ocean reads to Poseidon as a flood of generous offerings. Votey: a crude line drawing of a person, with the caption 'Boy the sky gods must love us' — implying the same logic applies to air pollution and the gods of the sky.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.