hold-up
Original: hold-up on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Princess (from a tower window): You did it! You slew the dragon! You may now have my hand in marriage.
Knight: Hold up.
Panel 2:
Knight (standing atop the dragon's carcass): There must be, what, 500 square meters of dragon skin here? Plus these gorgeous claws. And the horns!
Panel 3:
Knight: We're talking upwards of 60 tons of dragon oil and maybe 40 tons of meat, and I haven't even started on the organs, bones, eyes... My God I'm RICH.
Panel 4:
Princess: But—
Knight: Hahaha! I don't need to marry inbred nobility! I'm nouveau riche, baby!
Panel 5:
Knight: I'm gonna have gaudy clothes, a brand new gold-plated castle, and thousands of big-assed peasant girls!
Panel 6:
Princess: Being landed nobility is exactly the same except you have the legal right to kill people.
Knight: Ugh fine, let's get married.
Votey:
Knight (off-panel speech bubble): I'm gonna be down here drinking magic blood for a while, but then we can start planning the wedding.
(The knight is shown sitting beside the slain dragon's enormous head, leaning against it.)
Princess (from a tower window): You did it! You slew the dragon! You may now have my hand in marriage.
Knight: Hold up.
Panel 2:
Knight (standing atop the dragon's carcass): There must be, what, 500 square meters of dragon skin here? Plus these gorgeous claws. And the horns!
Panel 3:
Knight: We're talking upwards of 60 tons of dragon oil and maybe 40 tons of meat, and I haven't even started on the organs, bones, eyes... My God I'm RICH.
Panel 4:
Princess: But—
Knight: Hahaha! I don't need to marry inbred nobility! I'm nouveau riche, baby!
Panel 5:
Knight: I'm gonna have gaudy clothes, a brand new gold-plated castle, and thousands of big-assed peasant girls!
Panel 6:
Princess: Being landed nobility is exactly the same except you have the legal right to kill people.
Knight: Ugh fine, let's get married.
Votey:
Knight (off-panel speech bubble): I'm gonna be down here drinking magic blood for a while, but then we can start planning the wedding.
(The knight is shown sitting beside the slain dragon's enormous head, leaning against it.)
Alt text
A six-panel SMBC comic. A princess at a stone tower window tells a knight he has slain the dragon and may now have her hand in marriage. The knight says 'Hold up.' Standing atop the massive green dragon carcass, he begins tallying its value: roughly 500 square meters of dragon skin, gorgeous claws and horns, 60 tons of dragon oil, 40 tons of meat, plus organs, bones, and eyes — declaring 'My God I'm RICH.' He laughs that he no longer needs to marry inbred nobility because he's nouveau riche now, planning gaudy clothes, a gold-plated castle, and 'thousands of big-assed peasant girls.' The princess flatly replies that being landed nobility is exactly the same except you have the legal right to kill people. The knight immediately says 'Ugh fine, let's get married.' Votey: the knight sits leaning against the slain dragon's giant head, telling the princess he's going to be down here drinking magic blood for a while, but then they can start planning the wedding.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.