dragons
Original: dragons on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1: Two dragons converse in a cave-like setting.
First dragon (smaller, foreground): "I HATE THE WAY HUMANS WRITE DRAGONS."
Second dragon (larger): "I MEAN, TALK ABOUT IF THEY'D SURPRISED TO BE DRAGONS, AND THEY ALWAYS HAVE HUMAN-LIKE WORDS USING LIKE FIRE AND CLAW AND WING. BUT THOSE AREN'T NORMAL DRAGONS, OR THEIR ANATOMY. WHY WOULD WE CONSTANTLY BE REFERENCING THAT?"
Panel 2:
First dragon: "ECH, I'VE SEEN THE WAY DRAGONS WRITE HUMANS."
Second dragon: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN?"
Panel 3 (prose, framed as an excerpt of dragon-written human fiction):
"Never!" said Short-neck in human language for mostly square-shaped front teeth. She knew she was vulnerable due to her weak human skin and tiny brain, but she had to save her hairless offspring, Thumb-hands and Two-Legs, from the evil human wizard, Dangle-balls.
Votey:
(Continuation of the dragon-written human fiction, in prose:)
"I will be the highest ranking social ape!" noised Dangle-balls. Short-neck could see his face flush red, but due to her human vision was not able to perceive thermal changes, which had a longer wavelength.
First dragon (smaller, foreground): "I HATE THE WAY HUMANS WRITE DRAGONS."
Second dragon (larger): "I MEAN, TALK ABOUT IF THEY'D SURPRISED TO BE DRAGONS, AND THEY ALWAYS HAVE HUMAN-LIKE WORDS USING LIKE FIRE AND CLAW AND WING. BUT THOSE AREN'T NORMAL DRAGONS, OR THEIR ANATOMY. WHY WOULD WE CONSTANTLY BE REFERENCING THAT?"
Panel 2:
First dragon: "ECH, I'VE SEEN THE WAY DRAGONS WRITE HUMANS."
Second dragon: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN?"
Panel 3 (prose, framed as an excerpt of dragon-written human fiction):
"Never!" said Short-neck in human language for mostly square-shaped front teeth. She knew she was vulnerable due to her weak human skin and tiny brain, but she had to save her hairless offspring, Thumb-hands and Two-Legs, from the evil human wizard, Dangle-balls.
Votey:
(Continuation of the dragon-written human fiction, in prose:)
"I will be the highest ranking social ape!" noised Dangle-balls. Short-neck could see his face flush red, but due to her human vision was not able to perceive thermal changes, which had a longer wavelength.
Alt text
A three-panel SMBC comic. In the first two panels, two cartoon dragons talk in a dark cave. The smaller dragon complains, "I hate the way humans write dragons," and the larger one agrees, griping that human authors always have dragons referencing fire, claws, and wings, which isn't how real dragons would think. The smaller dragon retorts, "Ech, I've seen the way dragons write humans." The larger asks, "What do you mean?" The third panel is a block of prose styled as a dragon's attempt at writing a human character: "'Never!' said Short-neck in human language for mostly square-shaped front teeth. She knew she was vulnerable due to her weak human skin and tiny brain, but she had to save her hairless offspring, Thumb-hands and Two-Legs, from the evil human wizard, Dangle-balls." The joke is that dragons describe humans through alien dragon-eyes, reducing human traits to absurd literal labels. The votey (bonus panel) continues the dragon's story: "'I will be the highest ranking social ape!' noised Dangle-balls. Short-neck could see his face flush red, but due to her human vision was not able to perceive thermal changes, which had a longer wavelength."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.