soulmate-4
Original: soulmate-4 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Man (praying, looking up): DEAR GOD, IS THERE A SOULMATE OUT THERE FOR ME SOMEWHERE?
Voice from above (God): THAT DEPENDS.
Panel 2:
God: DO YOU MEAN A SOULMATE IN THE SENSE OF AN INTANGIBLE CONGRUENCE OF SPIRIT THAT WILL BIND YOU TOGETHER THROUGH ALL HARDSHIPS, OR A SOULMATE IN THE SENSE OF SOMEONE WHO IS A SORT OF EMOTIONAL CONVENIENCE PREFABRICATED WITH ALL OF YOUR BIASES NO MATTER HOW TRIVIAL, CHALLENGING NOTHING, ACCEPTING ALL?
[A large close-up of God's face is shown to the right; the man stands small below the giant speech bubble.]
Panel 3:
God: REMEMBER, I CAN READ YOUR THOUGHTS.
Man: SECOND KIND WITH A HUGE ASS.
Votey:
Man: IF THE ASS IS BIG ENOUGH I'LL START GOING TO CHURCH AGAIN.
Man (praying, looking up): DEAR GOD, IS THERE A SOULMATE OUT THERE FOR ME SOMEWHERE?
Voice from above (God): THAT DEPENDS.
Panel 2:
God: DO YOU MEAN A SOULMATE IN THE SENSE OF AN INTANGIBLE CONGRUENCE OF SPIRIT THAT WILL BIND YOU TOGETHER THROUGH ALL HARDSHIPS, OR A SOULMATE IN THE SENSE OF SOMEONE WHO IS A SORT OF EMOTIONAL CONVENIENCE PREFABRICATED WITH ALL OF YOUR BIASES NO MATTER HOW TRIVIAL, CHALLENGING NOTHING, ACCEPTING ALL?
[A large close-up of God's face is shown to the right; the man stands small below the giant speech bubble.]
Panel 3:
God: REMEMBER, I CAN READ YOUR THOUGHTS.
Man: SECOND KIND WITH A HUGE ASS.
Votey:
Man: IF THE ASS IS BIG ENOUGH I'LL START GOING TO CHURCH AGAIN.
Alt text
A man prays, looking up, and asks: "Dear God, is there a soulmate out there for me somewhere?" A voice from above answers, "That depends." In the next panel, beside a large close-up of God's smiling face, God elaborates in a huge speech bubble: "Do you mean a soulmate in the sense of an intangible congruence of spirit that will bind you together through all hardships, or a soulmate in the sense of someone who is a sort of emotional convenience prefabricated with all of your biases no matter how trivial, challenging nothing, accepting all?" In the final panel God adds, "Remember, I can read your thoughts," and the man instantly answers, "Second kind with a huge ass." Votey: a close-up of the man's lower face as he says, "If the ass is big enough I'll start going to church again."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.