love-8
Original: love-8 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1: A blonde woman prays, eyes closed.
Woman: DEAR GOD, PLEASE PLEASE MAKE BOBBY JEFFERS FALL IN LOVE WITH ME.
A shadowy figure (labeled "BAT ENTITY") sits in the dark with a glowing speech bubble.
Bat Entity: ON IT.
Panel 2 (caption: LATER THAT EVENING): The woman knocks on a door of a house.
Man (offscreen / from window): BOBBY?
Woman: HI ALEXANDRA. I... GUESS... I LOVE YOU?
Panel 3: A distraught man speaks.
Man: I WAS HAVING DINNER WITH MY GIRLFRIEND'S FAMILY AND SUDDENLY I HAD THIS COMPULSIVE HATRED FOR THEM. I DON'T UNDERSTAND IT.
Panel 4: The man continues, agitated.
Man: I BROKE UP WITH HER. EVERYONE WAS SO ANGRY AND I WAS ANGRY AND SAD. EVERYTHING WAS SO SAD AND I WAS SO ANGRY.
Panel 5: The man, eyes wide.
Man: AND THEN YOU POPPED INTO MY HEAD EVEN THOUGH I DON'T REALLY KNOW YOU OUTSIDE OF YOU TAKING CREEPY GLANCES AT ME BY THE LOCKERS.
Woman (small bubble): MMM, YEP.
Panel 6: The woman talks to the small distant man.
Woman: SO ANYWAY, I THINK I'M HAVING A STROKE. DO YOU WANNA BE MY DATE TO THE EMERGENCY ROOM?
Man: LET ME GET MY COAT!
Panel 7: The woman stands outside at night, looking up.
Woman: THANKS, LORD!
Voice from above (the Bat Entity): THANK YOU FOR BELIEVING!
Votey:
A single panel. A pious woman, hands clasped, prays toward a smug, content figure.
Woman: DEAR LORD PLEASE LIGHTNING HIM IF HE CHANGES HIS MIND.
Woman: DEAR GOD, PLEASE PLEASE MAKE BOBBY JEFFERS FALL IN LOVE WITH ME.
A shadowy figure (labeled "BAT ENTITY") sits in the dark with a glowing speech bubble.
Bat Entity: ON IT.
Panel 2 (caption: LATER THAT EVENING): The woman knocks on a door of a house.
Man (offscreen / from window): BOBBY?
Woman: HI ALEXANDRA. I... GUESS... I LOVE YOU?
Panel 3: A distraught man speaks.
Man: I WAS HAVING DINNER WITH MY GIRLFRIEND'S FAMILY AND SUDDENLY I HAD THIS COMPULSIVE HATRED FOR THEM. I DON'T UNDERSTAND IT.
Panel 4: The man continues, agitated.
Man: I BROKE UP WITH HER. EVERYONE WAS SO ANGRY AND I WAS ANGRY AND SAD. EVERYTHING WAS SO SAD AND I WAS SO ANGRY.
Panel 5: The man, eyes wide.
Man: AND THEN YOU POPPED INTO MY HEAD EVEN THOUGH I DON'T REALLY KNOW YOU OUTSIDE OF YOU TAKING CREEPY GLANCES AT ME BY THE LOCKERS.
Woman (small bubble): MMM, YEP.
Panel 6: The woman talks to the small distant man.
Woman: SO ANYWAY, I THINK I'M HAVING A STROKE. DO YOU WANNA BE MY DATE TO THE EMERGENCY ROOM?
Man: LET ME GET MY COAT!
Panel 7: The woman stands outside at night, looking up.
Woman: THANKS, LORD!
Voice from above (the Bat Entity): THANK YOU FOR BELIEVING!
Votey:
A single panel. A pious woman, hands clasped, prays toward a smug, content figure.
Woman: DEAR LORD PLEASE LIGHTNING HIM IF HE CHANGES HIS MIND.
Alt text
An SMBC comic. Panel 1: A blonde woman prays with closed eyes, "Dear God, please please make Bobby Jeffers fall in love with me." In the dark sits a shadowy crowned figure labeled "BAT ENTITY" whose glowing speech bubble replies, "ON IT." Panel 2 (Later that evening): The woman knocks on a door; a voice asks "Bobby?" and she awkwardly answers, "Hi Alexandra. I... guess... I love you?" Panel 3: A distraught man recounts, "I was having dinner with my girlfriend's family and suddenly I had this compulsive hatred for them. I don't understand it." Panel 4: "I broke up with her. Everyone was so angry and I was angry and sad." Panel 5: Wide-eyed, "And then you popped into my head even though I don't really know you outside of you taking creepy glances at me by the lockers," and the woman mutters "Mmm, yep." Panel 6: She asks, "So anyway, I think I'm having a stroke. Do you wanna be my date to the emergency room?" He eagerly says "Let me get my coat!" Panel 7: Outside at night she looks up, "Thanks, Lord!" and a voice from above answers, "Thank YOU for believing!" The joke: a divine entity granted her prayer by wrecking the man's life until he loved her. Votey: A woman prays with hands clasped to a smug godlike figure: "Dear Lord please lightning him if he changes his mind."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.