flatten
Original: flatten on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
A woman with reddish-brown hair sits at a computer, looking back over her shoulder at an off-panel speaker.
Off-panel speaker: "Hey Liana! You know that thing you like?"
Liana: "Yeah?"
Panel 2:
Liana continues looking back, the computer in front of her.
Off-panel speaker: "Wait if you can't put it in a preference to a convention of your identity, so that your purchasing behavior and media consumption habits became HIGHLY PREDICTABLE?"
Panel 3:
Liana turns more toward the speaker, gesturing.
Liana: "New, they're trying to flatten out my personality! Do you see how easy it'd be to sell me if I get more predictable?"
Off-panel speaker: "Shoot, you got me. I'm so edgy."
Panel 4:
Liana faces her computer screen.
Off-panel speaker: "Would you like any of these 12 books about a more focused and mindful life?"
Votey:
A small figure sits hunched at a desk in front of a screen.
Figure: "WHY YES. I SON OF A BITCH."
A woman with reddish-brown hair sits at a computer, looking back over her shoulder at an off-panel speaker.
Off-panel speaker: "Hey Liana! You know that thing you like?"
Liana: "Yeah?"
Panel 2:
Liana continues looking back, the computer in front of her.
Off-panel speaker: "Wait if you can't put it in a preference to a convention of your identity, so that your purchasing behavior and media consumption habits became HIGHLY PREDICTABLE?"
Panel 3:
Liana turns more toward the speaker, gesturing.
Liana: "New, they're trying to flatten out my personality! Do you see how easy it'd be to sell me if I get more predictable?"
Off-panel speaker: "Shoot, you got me. I'm so edgy."
Panel 4:
Liana faces her computer screen.
Off-panel speaker: "Would you like any of these 12 books about a more focused and mindful life?"
Votey:
A small figure sits hunched at a desk in front of a screen.
Figure: "WHY YES. I SON OF A BITCH."
Alt text
A four-panel SMBC comic. A woman with reddish-brown hair sits at a computer and turns to answer an off-panel voice. The voice asks whether she'd like to reduce her identity to a predictable convention so her purchasing and media-consumption habits become "highly predictable." She protests that they're trying to flatten out her personality and points out how easy she'd be to sell to if she became more predictable. The voice concedes ("Shoot, you got me") then immediately pitches her "12 books about a more focused and mindful life." Votey: a small hunched figure sits at a screen and caves instantly, saying "WHY YES. I SON OF A BITCH" - the joke being that the critique of being made predictable is itself the perfect hook to sell her self-improvement books.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.