nouning
Original: nouning on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
God (an off-panel voice): GOD: DOES MATH EXIST? LIKE, IS IT REAL?
A woman with dark hair (annoyed): JEEEEEEZ. I MEAN, YOU HUMANS. WHY DOES EVERYTHING HAVE TO BE A NOUN WITH YOU?
Panel 2:
God: DOES RUNNING EXIST? HAVE YOU EVER HELD A PIECE OF RUNNING? NO? HOW ABOUT "TASTINESS"? CAN YOU BREAK OFF A HUNK OF TASTINESS AND PUT IT IN A BOX?
Panel 3:
God: NO? WELL, I GUESS IT'S ONE GREAT BIG MYSTERY THEN. WAOA. LIKE, DOES RUNNING "EXIST"? IS IT "OUT THERE"?
Panel 4:
The woman (shouting): PLEASE BE MORE RESPECTFUL OK
(God responds with a long mocking jeer: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOO)
Votey:
A thought/speech bubble shows: MAN, I'M NOT EVEN SURE I EXIST.
God (an off-panel voice): GOD: DOES MATH EXIST? LIKE, IS IT REAL?
A woman with dark hair (annoyed): JEEEEEEZ. I MEAN, YOU HUMANS. WHY DOES EVERYTHING HAVE TO BE A NOUN WITH YOU?
Panel 2:
God: DOES RUNNING EXIST? HAVE YOU EVER HELD A PIECE OF RUNNING? NO? HOW ABOUT "TASTINESS"? CAN YOU BREAK OFF A HUNK OF TASTINESS AND PUT IT IN A BOX?
Panel 3:
God: NO? WELL, I GUESS IT'S ONE GREAT BIG MYSTERY THEN. WAOA. LIKE, DOES RUNNING "EXIST"? IS IT "OUT THERE"?
Panel 4:
The woman (shouting): PLEASE BE MORE RESPECTFUL OK
(God responds with a long mocking jeer: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOO)
Votey:
A thought/speech bubble shows: MAN, I'M NOT EVEN SURE I EXIST.
Alt text
A four-panel SMBC comic. An exasperated dark-haired woman argues with God, whose voice comes from off-panel. Panel 1: God asks, "Does math exist? Like, is it real?" The woman snaps, "Jeeeeeez. I mean, you humans. Why does everything have to be a noun with you?" Panel 2: God presses on: "Does running exist? Have you ever held a piece of running? No? How about 'tastiness'? Can you break off a hunk of tastiness and put it in a box?" Panel 3: God muses, "No? Well, I guess it's one great big mystery then. Waoa. Like, does running 'exist'? Is it 'out there'?" Panel 4: The woman shouts "Please be more respectful ok," while God mockingly jeers a long "oooooooooo." The joke flips the usual human-questions-God dynamic: God is the obnoxious one needling a human with sophomoric philosophy-of-language questions. Votey: a speech bubble reads, "Man, I'm not even sure I exist."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.